whats on your criminal record?

[⅃( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)L]

Is this where I come to brag about all of the times I was caught breaking the law? I'd really like to know because every time I brag about my criminal record to the people around me, they all look at me as though I'm a pathetic idiot. It would be nice to get some kudos for making mistakes that ended up on paper for several years, since I really feel like those mistakes should actually be viewed as accomplishments. If this is the place, let me know.

[⅃( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)L]

Is this where I come to brag about all of the times I was caught breaking the law? I'd really like to know because every time I brag about my criminal record to the people around me, they all look at me as though I'm a pathetic idiot. It would be nice to get some kudos for making mistakes that ended up on paper for several years, since I really feel like those mistakes should actually be viewed as accomplishments. If this is the place, let me know.