Dono Vs ADONiS (Dono Wins 3-0 KO)

Dono Vs ADONiS

Rules are posted in this thread.
Topics are posted in this thread.

CHECK INS ARE DUE FRIDAY (07-15-11) AT 11:59PM PST. VERSES ARE DUE TUESDAY (07-19-11) AT 11:59PM. NO EXCEPTIONS.

Line Length: 20-30 lines.

EVERY participant must vote on at least two other battles in the league. If failed to do so, their current battle will result in a no show.

Voting Rubix
Rhyming Scheme/Flow
Vocabulary
Topic/Meaning
Storytelling/Progression
Emotion
Poetic Techniques
Ending

GOOD LUCK

Dono Vs ADONiS

Rules are posted in this thread.
Topics are posted in this thread.

CHECK INS ARE DUE FRIDAY (07-15-11) AT 11:59PM PST. VERSES ARE DUE TUESDAY (07-19-11) AT 11:59PM. NO EXCEPTIONS.

Line Length: 20-30 lines.

EVERY participant must vote on at least two other battles in the league. If failed to do so, their current battle will result in a no show.

Voting Rubix
Rhyming Scheme/Flow
Vocabulary
Topic/Meaning
Storytelling/Progression
Emotion
Poetic Techniques
Ending

GOOD LUCK

[Black Book]

I remember telling my mom school is torture, The psychiatrist said, "This kid is sorta dealing w/ split personality disorder."
I started having weekly sessions & taking anti-depressants, but I never felt their presence.
I was a shy cat on the outer shell, but inside I was a beast out of hell; A lion with the stoutest tail, Sharp teeth in my mouth as well.
I tried hard to contain it, but between when the sun came/went, I had blackouts that left son pained sick.
The flashes of light w/ emotions running deeper than oceans, I tried so many of the doctor's potions & used so many bottles of pain easing lotions.
Yet the beast thrived, I was a walking Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde, I slept paranoid; gun at my side, Suspecting everyone had lied.
It's not a "mental disfunction"..It's somethin' that's wrong w/ more than this pumpkin! Cuz one night I cracked & a body was slumped in a car on a brisk injunction.
Bloody knife..The beast had won, I tossed the magnum even though it had done nothing in my actions I couldn't fathom.
I ran home cleaned the blade, Grabbed a razor..leaned to shave, Hoping with my beard my actions would be beamed away.
But in the mirror I saw the beast, As it raises it's clawed paw it speaks, "It was that fucking idiot doctor that drew the last straw at least."

[Black Book]

I remember telling my mom school is torture, The psychiatrist said, "This kid is sorta dealing w/ split personality disorder."
I started having weekly sessions & taking anti-depressants, but I never felt their presence.
I was a shy cat on the outer shell, but inside I was a beast out of hell; A lion with the stoutest tail, Sharp teeth in my mouth as well.
I tried hard to contain it, but between when the sun came/went, I had blackouts that left son pained sick.
The flashes of light w/ emotions running deeper than oceans, I tried so many of the doctor's potions & used so many bottles of pain easing lotions.
Yet the beast thrived, I was a walking Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde, I slept paranoid; gun at my side, Suspecting everyone had lied.
It's not a "mental disfunction"..It's somethin' that's wrong w/ more than this pumpkin! Cuz one night I cracked & a body was slumped in a car on a brisk injunction.
Bloody knife..The beast had won, I tossed the magnum even though it had done nothing in my actions I couldn't fathom.
I ran home cleaned the blade, Grabbed a razor..leaned to shave, Hoping with my beard my actions would be beamed away.
But in the mirror I saw the beast, As it raises it's clawed paw it speaks, "It was that fucking idiot doctor that drew the last straw at least."

[Dono]

I hope I did this right...Lemme know if I fucked anything up....Good luck to you too B-B



I take you to a home where passion once flourished
The love is far gone now; dead, ashen, malnourished
Where there were intimate moments, smiles and delight
Has decayed hideously into contrite, vile bile and spite
A fight and mild disdain, evolved into wild, piled up pain
Now only torn emotion, broken hearts, and a child remain
Too young to know the difference his life is innocence
Manages to escape the violent strife through ignorance
I stand amazed by youth's ability for adaptation
Halls echo with loud screams, hostility and accusations
"Are you telling me I'm to blame for your infidelity?
Sometimes I doubt that's even my kid, well is he?"
"I'll stop at nothing short of taking you to court to see
The baby means I have to resort to you supporting me"
When they look into the child's eyes they only see a prize
To win each don a disguise, plant seeds for a tree of lies
Tangled amongst the long branches the lonely youth dangles
Yet the judge's perception reaches deep, even with truth mangled
He dissects the deception, the objections are shady
Recognizes the lack of affection for the baby
Steps in to end this terrible metaphor for tug-of-war
Takes the child as his own, so there are love and hugs in store
Parents really only upset that neither one of them won
Indifferent to the new life that has begun for their son

[Dono]

I hope I did this right...Lemme know if I fucked anything up....Good luck to you too B-B



I take you to a home where passion once flourished
The love is far gone now; dead, ashen, malnourished
Where there were intimate moments, smiles and delight
Has decayed hideously into contrite, vile bile and spite
A fight and mild disdain, evolved into wild, piled up pain
Now only torn emotion, broken hearts, and a child remain
Too young to know the difference his life is innocence
Manages to escape the violent strife through ignorance
I stand amazed by youth's ability for adaptation
Halls echo with loud screams, hostility and accusations
"Are you telling me I'm to blame for your infidelity?
Sometimes I doubt that's even my kid, well is he?"
"I'll stop at nothing short of taking you to court to see
The baby means I have to resort to you supporting me"
When they look into the child's eyes they only see a prize
To win each don a disguise, plant seeds for a tree of lies
Tangled amongst the long branches the lonely youth dangles
Yet the judge's perception reaches deep, even with truth mangled
He dissects the deception, the objections are shady
Recognizes the lack of affection for the baby
Steps in to end this terrible metaphor for tug-of-war
Takes the child as his own, so there are love and hugs in store
Parents really only upset that neither one of them won
Indifferent to the new life that has begun for their son

[Wigsplit]

this was close, both came with good imagery n nice vocab
Rhyming Scheme/Flow-dono
Vocabulary-dono
Topic/Meaning-dono
Storytelling/Progression-book
Emotion-dono
Poetic Techniques-dono
Ending-dono

dono edged it out in most of the departments for me, but book was hellatight too
vote=DonoTheGod

[Wigsplit]

this was close, both came with good imagery n nice vocab
Rhyming Scheme/Flow-dono
Vocabulary-dono
Topic/Meaning-dono
Storytelling/Progression-book
Emotion-dono
Poetic Techniques-dono
Ending-dono

dono edged it out in most of the departments for me, but book was hellatight too
vote=DonoTheGod

[Catharsis]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow: Toss up
Vocabulary: Dono
Topic/Meaning: Book
Storytelling/Progression: Book
Emotion: Dono
Poetic Techniques: Dono
Ending: leaning towards Dono, but also a toss up.

Good drops on both sides. Book took the rappers approach, and IMO had the better storyline and felt like it could have been normal verse. Dono had a more emotional, poetic drop. Also good shit, less like a normal rap verse but conveyed the message clearly and had a concise ending. I think Dono might have edged this one slightly...

[Catharsis]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow: Toss up
Vocabulary: Dono
Topic/Meaning: Book
Storytelling/Progression: Book
Emotion: Dono
Poetic Techniques: Dono
Ending: leaning towards Dono, but also a toss up.

Good drops on both sides. Book took the rappers approach, and IMO had the better storyline and felt like it could have been normal verse. Dono had a more emotional, poetic drop. Also good shit, less like a normal rap verse but conveyed the message clearly and had a concise ending. I think Dono might have edged this one slightly...

[TheGeneral]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow: Both Did Good
Vocabulary: Dono
Topic/Meaning: Dono
Storytelling/Progression: Book
Emotion: Dono
Poetic Techniques: Dono
Ending: Dono

Both had some nice verses here with meaning and i could telll alot of thought went into each verse. I jus enjoyed Dono's story a bit more and felt it. Nice spar here and goodluck in future battles

[TheGeneral]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow: Both Did Good
Vocabulary: Dono
Topic/Meaning: Dono
Storytelling/Progression: Book
Emotion: Dono
Poetic Techniques: Dono
Ending: Dono

Both had some nice verses here with meaning and i could telll alot of thought went into each verse. I jus enjoyed Dono's story a bit more and felt it. Nice spar here and goodluck in future battles

[Revan]

Dono wins via 3-0 KO.

[Revan]

Dono wins via 3-0 KO.