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Reppin:Detroit, Michigan, United States


 
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Tag Team Championship #10
Length: 16 Lines

Phracture (60%) Won
Ranked #-- This Month (#256 All Time)
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Reppin: Brooklyn, New York, United States
OSKAR (40%) Lost
Ranked #-- This Month (#499 All Time)
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Reppin: London, England, United Kingdom



Phracture

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OSKAR
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Voting has ended for this battle (battle finished on 2019-07-21 23:21:17).

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Droppin at 11 tonight

Posted on: 2019-07-21 09:05:01 Private Message Phracture


I’m good with an extension if you don’t make it

Posted on: 2019-07-21 17:54:43 Private Message OSKAR


One team didnt fill the box or this would have been alot closer. Went with the team I thought outshined the opposing team with execution and not forcing their wordplay. Botb for ne was...

if their "words really had flow?" then they be "DROWNIN ON MANY LIES!" so ya think these "jokers" are "COUNTIN ON ANY PRIZE?" well dont "bank on IT too much" coz these "CLOWNS" ARE NOT "PENNY WISE!"

Fair is in

Voted: Yes (Hidden)
Posted on: 2019-07-22 07:31:47 Private Message Rai


there a few things that kinda threw me off in both the verses so will vote post expos 

Posted on: 2019-07-22 08:09:09 Private Message The Saaxxx Baba


Some of my fave people involved on both sides. Lemme peep: Phar - first half of the verse was full of swag and flow, throwback LB style. H20 line was niceee. Sonic bubble me likedd. OSK - Not sure if i liked the oprah line or not lol, the pennywise bar was too obvious for me. Dont usually like anogram bars but the closer was funny lol. Overall: Honestly i just felt one verse was better alround here. Fairs in. 1/

Voted: Yes (Hidden)
Posted on: 2019-07-22 10:08:15 Private Message RULE


I felt both had very solid verses but one had a few more hiccups. Read this many times but my winner here was a bit cleaner overall. Prhac/Swift. GREAT battle here fairs in

Voted: Yes (Hidden)
Posted on: 2019-07-23 11:39:02 Private Message GOOD GRIEF


I'm going to expo this bar-by-bar, using the scorecard method. 0: meh bar. 1: ok bar. 2: good bar. 3+: very good bar (the more the better). -1 or less: bad bar (the more the worse).

Phracture / Swiftkey

Why’d they give these BURGERS A DEATHMATCH "Last Round Talent didn't Show up" & its Deja-vu... & ya VERSES REFLECT THAT!

- Not sure what you mean by BURGERS here. It's not any sort of pejorative slang term that I recall ever having heard before so it feels pretty damned forced. But I'll pretend it makes sense and say that this is a good concept, not great, but good, and the flow sells it. +2

Yall got COMEDY CAREERS Now “OSKAR gettin held up by HVK” but im gettin trophies for BODIES OF THE YEAR!

- I don't know what this is about. The bar feels pretty solidly executed but given the lack of time I have left to vote, I'm not going to research it and instead just leave you with a +1.

lemme find out yall ‘grow weed’.. i’m CLUTCHIN A 45 ARM., ‘take a Hp from u every second’.. think hes STUCK IN A FORTNITE STORM!

Not sure what this is about either honestly, I get the hp / hit points thing but the rest is idk. Tentative +1 because it looks like it should be a decent bar.

Shouldve done this last week guess they ORDERED IN THE TRASH LATE - “bucks droppin on the screen” the 4 a LEAVE’em “HALF BAKED”; u’ll See “a steam trail from H to O” like WATER in the GAS PHASE !!(h20)

- ORDERED doesn't fit with the rest of the multi sets here to my ear, but I'll give you a tentative accent pass. Not sure what the half baked punch was about but the steam trail punch was solid. I'll hesitantly give this a +2.

Im the Next King watch as COSMIC TROUBLE COMES TO YOU HOES, You gon “choke comin for the heir” u need a SONIC BUBBLE UNDER THE FLOW!

I guess this is a reference to the Sonic video games, which I've never actually played (gasp!) But aside from the fact I didn't immediately grasp the reference, and that the first multi sounds moderately contrived, it's an okay punch. +1.

"0 titles between the both of you" ? now its REK WITH A BRAVEHART, Ima stop yall from “Having Shares with 0 Stock”... now go INVEST IN A GRAVEYARD

- No idea what this is about. +0 since I can't judge the concept either way.

To keep it together u gon NEED HYPHENS when RE WRITTIN QUOTES Yall may battle noobs and BREEZE BY WIT JOKES But u only “robin on the small scale”... screamin TEEN TITANS GO!

- I generally don't like bars that aren't written with a direct metaphor or wordplay, but the 'tangential' setup-punch relation worked pretty damned well here. I'm also generally not a fan of partial multi sets but it worked well here too. Despite being unconventionally written in some ways, this bar solidly executed a solid concept, so +2.

I'm tempted to give you some amount of minus points for not filling the box, but since fewer bars means fewer points (unless you have negative scoring bars), I don't think I need to explicitly factor that bit in.

Total score: 9

OSKAR / HVK

If yall did not know what these PRICKS ARE ALL ABOUT‘The floor is yours. Swift phracture’s all around’.. sikes ! we’ll be ‘QUICK TO STOMP YOU OUT’!

There's nothing particularly bad about this bar, it just wasn't "doing it" for me. Lackluster opener but not bad. +1.

so Let’s ‘collect our thots’ H! What were these ‘HOES BE THINKING’? we so ‘solid of the top’ like FROZEN WHIPPED CREAM while you BOTH SOME VICTIMS ‘that won’t get an easy pass’ if you was OPRAH ‘WIN-FREE!

- This whole section was alright. My only complaints about it are the HOES BE THINKING multi set (BE doesn't quite jibe with the other sets) and the way the Winfrey / Win-Free wordplay was executed (not really a natural turn of phrase). This is really a +1 section but since it's basically 2 bars I'll give this a collective +2.

They hope their PACT IS GREAT AN WORKS but in terms of your chances? in FACT YA MADE IT WORSE! phracture "fallin from grace so fast" someone might "CATCH THA LADY HURT" an watch "Swift get grabbed an taken" faster than "SNATCHIN TAYLORS PURSE!"

- Solid rhyming here, but the concept at the end is a total reach. You say we'll watch Swift get grabbed and taken... and then something about her PURSE?? Nah bro. Not really sure what the grace thing is about either. I guess it's some Taylor Swift reference? But not one I caught. Whatever, this all gets a collective +1.

if their "words really had flow?" then they be "DROWNIN ON MANY LIES!" so ya think these "jokers" are "COUNTIN ON ANY PRIZE?" well dont "bank on IT too much" coz these "CLOWNS" ARE NOT "PENNY WISE!"

- It / Pennywise and Flow / Drowning bars are just an absolute fucking no-no at this point. So even though this is all well-executed, I can't in good faith give it more than a +1.

just noobs that are not equipped with tha GREATNESS IT NEEDS TO COMPETE WITH ME !each hit I’m MAKING, IT SIMPLY DEPLETES HPs while you ‘just pick shit up as you go’ like CREATING A BUILD IN RPGS!

- Meh punch, terrible rhyming. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt because of your accent, and even though I'm tempted to give this a -1, leave you with a 0 instead.

you "scramble up tha letters in phracture an swiftkey?" youll see why we gonna FIGHT THA BITCHES TA DEATH! we discover one guys a "witch" an tha other likes to "rape turkeys" so we drop tha MIC AN GIVE YOU THA F! (witch rape turkeys F = phracture swiftkey).. 

- This is the critical moment in the entire battle, and the bar I want to talk the most about. Frankly, I could have entirely skipped over expo'ing the rest of this verse, and only done a brief criticism of Phracture / Swiftkey's verse, and gotten to pretty much the same conclusion on this battle.

I don't know which one of you wrote this bar, but I have a strong suspicion that it was HVK. Whichever one of you it is, I know exactly what you were thinking when you wrote this bar, because I've been in that same position myself. Believe me, I sympathize. You came up with this concept, probably with the help of some online anagram solving tool, and thought you were an absolute fucking cosmic text battle genius in the league of Isaac Newton and Albert Einstein, after which you just had to satisfy your overwhelming compulsion to turn it into a bar without the slightest thought as to HOW you were going to turn it into a bar or HOW good the resulting bar would be.

If you want to understand just how utterly, abominably atrocious this bar is, try looking at this from the perspective of someone who DIDN'T come up with this concept. Without the expo in parentheses, there is NO WAY that ANYBODY would be likely to figure out what the bar meant right after they read it. I doubt that more than a few people would be able to figure it out at all, even if they sat down and thought about it for a while. On top of that, you didn't even probably set up the phrase you were making an anagram of! "phracture and swiftkey" is not the same as "phracture swiftkey"... if you're going to reach like this, at least give yourself a solid platform to stand on before extending your arm.

Although I expect you to scream at me in IMs over this expo, I feel that this is a very distant fear, due to the very long recovery time associated with Tommy John surgeries.

Congratulations for all the wrong reasons, guys. You might have actually written the single worst bar in the history of LetsBeef.Com, even accounting for deliberately terrible bars. Not even when I adopted the form of Reggin did I think to write anything as inconceivably ungodly as this. But, now that the idea has been presented to me, I might as well copy it, just to prove that this bar is not only horrid, but not even difficult to imitate:

OSKAR HVK?

That's like I knocked out a large marine animal and then made the Victory sign with my hand!

SHARK KO V!

OSKAR HVK?

That's like I asked someone whether or not they own a pair of those sandals with the adjustable straps!

HAV KROKS?

Okay, I'm done ranting. This gets a minus 700 quintillion points for Team #2 and an automatic loss for your team, never mind that you would have lost anyway even if just gave it a minus five or something.

Fuck it all to hell.

Just be grateful I didn't rate your entire verse a "1 - Awful" for this galactic-sized steaming landfill of dog shit in the form of a text bar.

Fair's in.

Voted: Yes (Hidden)
Posted on: 2019-07-24 23:49:38 Private Message Shodan


That closing punchline is so fucked up it makes me want to kill myself in reverse then re-kill myself.

Posted on: 2019-08-27 04:52:42 Private Message Barzooka


Shodan with the greatest vote of all-time 🐐

Posted on: 2022-06-19 12:02:00 Private Message Lockhart

 

 

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