Ones piece was meh to aiight. Concepts i felt, were either not fully developed on or delivered strongly. Which is a shame as there was a lot of potential with the concepts. Kinda of a build you up to let you down at the end type of thing. Other dude, opening bar was a bad way to start. Wordig issues, forced multis, not saying he wasn't rhyming, just the wording swas forced in areas. A few set ups made little to no sense w/ the punch(es). Overall a pretty mehh battle here for a tourney. I've seen far better from one before, perhaps rusty? who knows.... actually hard to vote on this one, now i've reread each person piece multiple times. Literally a coin toss here. 

ROUND 2 Submission deadline: January 19, 11:59PM Eastern (GMT -5). Good luck fellas!

Good Luck

Expo: Expo: If a drug dealer was to pattern up squares it would mean to sort bricks out. If I was to pattern up louie (implying he's a square) it would mean sorting him out. It's London slang so ya'll might not of heard of it. Louis vuitton has square patterns going up there bags, purses etc. His crew is called cancers. Weed is used sometimes to treat cancer. Loud is weed. Cuba used to/still has massive nickle mines. You fold in poker. If it was a high stake it would have a lot of 0's. In some countries they use cow dung to power electricity. Dawg's outstanding in the field/dogs out, standing in the field". Farmers usually have dogs to herd sheep or whatever.

shit this was cool ... winner got my vote w/ better exceution of his punches and tha creativity and technicality of his bars ... loser had punches with sting, but imo tha execution wasn't up to his opponent's level which was tha standout reason for my vote ... fairs in 

Hmm,

Louis,

First bar was alright, I like the idea you went for but the fruit ninja / slice thing is played. I fucked with that address/drug set-up that was hot and I liked the final punch too. Extenze bar was decent, I didnt really like the musical arrest punch. You feel off towards the end primiarly because your closer is kinda played, even though its true - I aint been here long and I have read the whole italics/slant rhyme concept before. Took the sting out of it for me.

Bape,

First bar was good, medium-to-decent haymaker to start it off. The knee's pop / walking concept is played, the cancer/weed thing didn't make sense to me since you don't get cancer from bud. Poker concept was decent, could of been executed better I think your initial multi set was strange, could come back to the whole slant rhyming thing/accent so im not gonna dock off points for that. I fucked with the farmyard animals bar. Your closer was decent, tried to make it personal attacking his avi, i liked the blood rushing out the hood / neck shanked shit.

Closer then I expected, mostly due to Louie doing better than I thought he would (no offence, thought he would go for strictly flow but he came w/ some decent concepts), but two played lines in his verse cost him and I think Bape was a bit more consistent in delivering decent-to-good flips. Fairs in, goodluck to both.

Voted

FWIW I don't normally like to expo, but if you guys want an explanation of anything in here you can leave a comment here or DM me and I can break it down. 

Good battle I just felt one just did a bit more for me to take the win. Good concepts and punches from both sides but winner was more consistent with the schemes and structure which led to a harder hitting verse. Props to both. The fair is in

this was decent battle one edged it.

tough call here. winner based off punches. fairs in

I thought this battle was absolute heat, my vote is for the set of bars I preferred. I can't get to much in depth with why I chose who I did but shit was flame. 1.

felt one had better punches but my loser was still nice, don't get it twisted. fv, but just to end off cuz it irks me. Bape the double meaning meaning dog is out, standing in the field is a little bit of a reach.

PUN SHIZZ IN BUNCIZZ!

Alright, this is a great battle. Considering that this is in a GC and not an obvious bodybag, I think a strong breakdown is called for, so I'll examine both verses bar-by-bar before giving my thoughts on the battle as a whole. Note that I'll be mainly focusing on the negatives of each bar as part of my crusade for dropping knowledge, so my opinion of this battle's material is much higher than you might think from reading this expo.

Louie Dawgs:

I'ma a "fruit" ninja, the way I SLICE UP YOUR MEN// U suck, this battle's got "one-zero", like the votes for I what WRITE WITH THE PEN, sending mail's is the only time something that you WRITE IS ATTN:...???

- The one-zero / 10 concept was simple but decent, but the actual punch fell flat on its face. I get it, but it's forced as all hell. Since when is "Attn" a word, and how exactly would one pronounce it? Also, calling yourself a "fruit" might just be counterproductive. 5/10

this the story a of letsbeef LIFE WHEN IT ENDS, I GET A SENSE, this battles going NINETY TO TEN, bape why-did-you-fail?? you'll never address it directly just like drugs-in-the-mail...you just "talk in a circle" like interventions of adVICE FROM YA FRIENDS when you tryn'a get clean after the VICODIN ENDS!

- I'm starting to notice a pattern of your setup-punches being better than your bar-finisher punches. The "address it directly" concept was actually quite good, except for the godawful drugs/why rhyme. I get that internal multis are generally held to lower standards than regular multis, but come on. I also liked the final concept of talking in a circle, which was a creative flip on a fairly simple idea. Those are hard to come by these days. In my opinion, this bar's biggest flaw was the filler at the beginning. 7/10

seriously I'ma win this battle at like NINETY TO TEN, you just hope to 'inch it out' just like GUYS WITH EX-TENZE

- I get the concept, but god damn is that some forced wording. "Hey man, did you hear about this new penis enlargement program?" "Yeah bro, I heard it'll help you inch it out." 5/10

If you fucking faking I will SHOOT IT THROUGH YA CHEST, shots 'sing before they catch you' like a MUSICAL'S ARREST

- Um... what? A musical's arrest? Do you mean an arrest in a musical, or a musical being arrested? Taking this bar at face value, it seems like you mean the latter, which is just forced as all hell. If I assumed that you mean the former, it's an alright concept but nothing spectacular. 6/10

ya STUPID, NOT A VET...you're only crack if you're named after what you're using like a ROOSTER HAVING SEX!!

- You mean, like, a rooster making noise at the crack of dawn? I think I get this, but the wording is unnatural. Still, creative-ish. 5.5/10

I move on squares for honor like yaKUZA PLAYING CHESS, plus I'm moving for your king if you're assUMING THAT I 'JEST'

- Both of these concepts were fairly creative but also a bit forced, especially the second one. Also, the "yaKUZA PLAYING CHESS" multi is one hell of a slant. 6/10

FUCK IS THIS THING, MAN?? ghostwriting and shit...cats is MESSAGING EIGHTS, DAMN...closing ya chat would take your tactics out the 'window' like I'm ENDING YOUR GAMEPLAN

- Not a bad bar by any means. With that said, unless you're aware of Bape ghostwriting and I'm not, this borders on fake personal territory. Also, I prefer it when ending multis have a more direct connection to the setup. Here, there's no prior mention of anything directly related to a gameplan, which in my opinion weakens the bar even though it still makes sense. 6.5/10

cuz ya unoriginal, conFESS TO YA LAME FANS, your style is italics...all your TEXT HAS THE SAME SLANT!!

- Alright, I'll admit it: I saw this bar and fell in love. It doesn't seem like it should be particularly impressive, yet I thought it was amazing. Maybe it's the way that such an obvious idea was flipped so creatively. 8/10

Overall: The main flaw in this verse was forced concepts. Some of the setups and flips were just painful to read, which is even more of a shame considering the amount of creativity in this verse. 6/10

Bape:

When it comes to "substance? He's bottom of the bag" without tryna SMUGGLE HELLA SHERMS QUICK so now I gotta "pattern these squares up" and send him "back to the lab" like a STRUGGLED SELLER'S WORST MIX but if anyone claims "louie's final products good quality" it's a COUPLE LEATHER PURSES!

- There are a few things I need to point out about this bar. First off, the "pattern these squares up" concept absolutely had to be expo'd. I doubt that more than a tiny fraction of LBers would have understood it otherwise, even if it seems natural to you. Second, the wording in this bar was more than a bit unnatural. It's not Shiznit-tier, but here are two examples: 1. "SMUGGLE HELLA SHERMS QUICK" - maybe "sherms" is a natural slang word to you, but it isn't to me. 2. "STRUGGLED SELLER'S WORST MIX" - a "struggled seller"? That's more than slightly awkward to read. Third, I feel like your final setup is missing a word. It would have been much more natural if it were "louie's final products are good quality". With all those criticisms in mind, this is actually a decent bar, but it probably seemed much better to you than it will seem to anybody else. It borders on esoteric. 6/10

If it's BEEF FAGGOT? WE FLAMING KIDS Punsishers'll "pop a cap til ya'll can't walk" guess KNEE DAMAGE IS STRAINING BITCH! "Blow loud to their domes" so when THESE MAGGOTS ARE TAKIN HITS "cancer will be a distant memory" like their WEED HABITS ARE BREAKING SHIT!

- I've never heard the term "loud" for weed, but maybe I'm just ignorant so I'll give you a pass on that. I felt that the first two multis, mainly the second one, were slightly awkward, but not terribly so. The weed / cancer stuff was nicely executed and took a good personal angle. My only real conceptual criticism of it is the "blow loud to their domes" setup... you cure cancer by blowing weed to someone's dome? It makes sense but it's not quite naturally worded. 7/10

"Nich'll/Nickle have dude's buried underground" like if CUBAN MINES BREAK AND CLOSE BRUH the way ya'll see more "zero's getting folded" you'd of thought they was LOSING HIGH STAKES IN POKER!­

- In this bar, the second concept was way better than the first. "Nickel have dudes buried underground" isn't grammatically correct. Also, the "CUBAN MINES BREAK AND CLOSE BRUH" multi set was awkward. The zeros getting folded concept isn't very original but it was nicely executed. 6/10

Why you claiming you're dope in ya BARS AND BATTLES FOOL? I mean if "dawg's out-standing in the field" it's FARMYARD ANIMALS!

- Outstanding / out standing isn't the sort of wordplay that has me going insane, but the way it was incorporated into the punch made it solid. This is tied with Louie's closer as my Bar of the Battle pick. The only flaw I can point out is that BATTLES FOOL / ANIMALS is a marked slant to me. 8/10

So the way you keep "convertin' bull-shit to lightwork" we think LARGE ARSE CATTLE FUELS!

- Damn, you dipped really fast after that last excerpt. First, this concept is esoteric considering the obscurity of the reference. I doubt that a single reader would have understood this if you hadn't expo'd it. Second, the multi wording was more awkward than a fat dyslexic 9th grader asking the cheerleading captain to the prom. That's a real shame considering the conceptual creativity and fluent setup, but this was just not a good line. 5/10

He a gangsta now? Cause he got an avi of a dude taking DANK TO THE CHEST? Nah, Louie don't "gang bang" but his moms RANKED WITH THE BEST so if homie ever claims "bloods rushing out his hood" he prolly got SHANKED IN THE NECK!

- There's nothing exceptional about this bar. It's solid - nothing more, nothing less. The double meaning of "blood" as either the street gang or the circulatory fluid is obvious and played, and this flip was only mildly novel. Still, the preceding content made up for it, "yo momma" joke aside. 6/10

Overall: My biggest gripe with this verse was the awkward wording, closely followed by esoteric concepts incorporating obscure references. This was not a bad verse at all, but I think some editing could have made it a lot better. 6.5/10

Final Thoughts: This battle was very close. Both brought creative material that didn't live up to its full potential due to various technical faults. With that said, I have a winner, whom I think was slightly more creative and technically solid than his opponent. Fair's in.

Thanks for the long breakdown. Perhaps I should work to expo a couple of bars that may be confusing to some. The bar about  a musical's arrest refers to singing before an arrest in a musical, and the rooster line is actually a crackhead joke, I know that one is a bit obfuscated. The idea is that another name for a rooster is a cock, which is also a name for a penis. Thus, a rooster having sex is a cock using a cock. This relates back to the point about him being known as crack. Maybe just the "think" wasn't enough of a hint. 

There's also a typo, should read "You're only known as crack"

This battle was damn dope...

I just

Louie schemed nicely but didn't really have any hard hitting punches. Bape on the other hand schemed nicely and had bars that seem to have had more thought put into them. Win was pretty clear here.

MVGT: Bape 6-7