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  #1  
Unread 02-01-2013, 02:55 AM
RakishHeir
Basic Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
Default If anyone has free time

please critque my lyrics before I record them tomorrow, I appreciate any advice or wisdom dropped.

peace n' love see ya when the sun been risen for a few hours

life, is not worth wasting
I mean face it, you might only live one time
and I don't really know if that's true
but when you find out it might be too late for you
so use some common knowledge when debating
you gotta make moves man, can't rely on fate
can't rely on anyone that's all I'm saying
I've waited my whole life n' never been saved
I've been patiently pacing, taking hits, same shit
different day but I realized it's what I make it
...and sometimes it's kinda hard to take in
but worst comes go to school n' build yourself a space ship

take off, and you ain't ever gotta land
fuck the promised land man fate is in your hands
follow your dreams life ain't always what it seems
cause reality's what you make it even if you don't believe
it's in you! you can see it when you're sleeping
I love the gentle lullabies that chase me as I'm leaving
I don't wanna stay forever 'cause some day I gotta go
even if I never want to life has got it in it's flow

death, it's just something we created
many people hate it but someday they'll be related
so embrace it, I mean it's probably what you make it
just like life is, but a different stage to take in
I know you're probably sad when you see a loved one go
but you gotta understand the finale to their show
if we were never meant to go then we wouldn't have to go
so if you live forever I'm really sorry for your soul..
I mean everybody questions what happens when they die
then they die n' understand it like they knew it the whole time
and of course I'm gonna cry 'cause your presences what I loved
and I miss you like I should but I'll see you when I come

take off, and you ain't ever gotta land
fuck the promised land man fate is in your hands
follow your dreams life ain't always what it seems
cause it's really what you make it even if you don't believe
it's in you! you can see it when you're sleeping
I love the gentle lullabies that chase me as I'm leaving
I don't wanna stay forever 'cause some day I gotta go
even if I never want to life has got it in it's flow

life, am I back to you again?
where are all my friends, was I ever even dead?
now I'm back to questioning every single thing I hear
still waiting for the day that I'm a king n' life is fair
__________________
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Unread 02-01-2013, 02:55 AM   #1
 
RakishHeir
Basic Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Voted: 0 audio / 0 text
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
Default If anyone has free time

please critque my lyrics before I record them tomorrow, I appreciate any advice or wisdom dropped.

peace n' love see ya when the sun been risen for a few hours

life, is not worth wasting
I mean face it, you might only live one time
and I don't really know if that's true
but when you find out it might be too late for you
so use some common knowledge when debating
you gotta make moves man, can't rely on fate
can't rely on anyone that's all I'm saying
I've waited my whole life n' never been saved
I've been patiently pacing, taking hits, same shit
different day but I realized it's what I make it
...and sometimes it's kinda hard to take in
but worst comes go to school n' build yourself a space ship

take off, and you ain't ever gotta land
fuck the promised land man fate is in your hands
follow your dreams life ain't always what it seems
cause reality's what you make it even if you don't believe
it's in you! you can see it when you're sleeping
I love the gentle lullabies that chase me as I'm leaving
I don't wanna stay forever 'cause some day I gotta go
even if I never want to life has got it in it's flow

death, it's just something we created
many people hate it but someday they'll be related
so embrace it, I mean it's probably what you make it
just like life is, but a different stage to take in
I know you're probably sad when you see a loved one go
but you gotta understand the finale to their show
if we were never meant to go then we wouldn't have to go
so if you live forever I'm really sorry for your soul..
I mean everybody questions what happens when they die
then they die n' understand it like they knew it the whole time
and of course I'm gonna cry 'cause your presences what I loved
and I miss you like I should but I'll see you when I come

take off, and you ain't ever gotta land
fuck the promised land man fate is in your hands
follow your dreams life ain't always what it seems
cause it's really what you make it even if you don't believe
it's in you! you can see it when you're sleeping
I love the gentle lullabies that chase me as I'm leaving
I don't wanna stay forever 'cause some day I gotta go
even if I never want to life has got it in it's flow

life, am I back to you again?
where are all my friends, was I ever even dead?
now I'm back to questioning every single thing I hear
still waiting for the day that I'm a king n' life is fair
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  #2  
Unread 02-01-2013, 04:32 PM
Mr-Felon
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 3,239
Mentioned: 226 Post(s)
Tagged: 9 Thread(s)
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
4 Won / 0 Lost
Default

Don't waste your time that shit wack as fuck
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Unread 02-01-2013, 04:32 PM   #2
 
Mr-Felon
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
4 Won / 0 Lost
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Voted: 49 audio / 75 text
Posts: 3,239
Mentioned: 226 Post(s)
Tagged: 9 Thread(s)


Default

Don't waste your time that shit wack as fuck
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  #3  
Unread 02-01-2013, 04:37 PM
RakishHeir
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr-Felon View Post
bump
thanks dawg
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Unread 02-01-2013, 04:37 PM   #3
 
RakishHeir
Basic Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Voted: 0 audio / 0 text
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr-Felon View Post
bump
thanks dawg
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  #4  
Unread 02-01-2013, 04:39 PM
Mr-Felon
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 3,239
Mentioned: 226 Post(s)
Tagged: 9 Thread(s)
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
4 Won / 0 Lost
Default

I see you back to rhyming 3 words per song..........smh
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Unread 02-01-2013, 04:39 PM   #4
 
Mr-Felon
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
4 Won / 0 Lost
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Voted: 49 audio / 75 text
Posts: 3,239
Mentioned: 226 Post(s)
Tagged: 9 Thread(s)


Default

I see you back to rhyming 3 words per song..........smh
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  #5  
Unread 02-01-2013, 04:43 PM
RakishHeir
Basic Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr-Felon View Post
I can't even rhyme any words I wish I could rap like you Kasper
thanks dawg
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Unread 02-01-2013, 04:43 PM   #5
 
RakishHeir
Basic Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Voted: 0 audio / 0 text
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr-Felon View Post
I can't even rhyme any words I wish I could rap like you Kasper
thanks dawg
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  #6  
Unread 02-01-2013, 05:02 PM
ViTRiOL ViTRiOL is on FIRE! 5+ wins in a row!
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 2,394
Mentioned: 510 Post(s)
Tagged: 26 Thread(s)
Estimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 stars
Ranked Audio Record
11 Won / 4 Lost
Estimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
141 Won / 35 Lost
Default

Don't revert to mis-quoting like Felon does. That shit is weak.
__________________


"A man is the sum of his actions."
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Unread 02-01-2013, 05:02 PM   #6
 
ViTRiOL ViTRiOL is on FIRE! 5+ wins in a row!
Estimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 stars
Ranked Audio Record
11 Won / 4 Lost
Estimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
141 Won / 35 Lost
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Voted: 18 audio / 763 text
Posts: 2,394
Mentioned: 510 Post(s)
Tagged: 26 Thread(s)


Default

Don't revert to mis-quoting like Felon does. That shit is weak.
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"A man is the sum of his actions."
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  #7  
Unread 02-01-2013, 05:10 PM
Mr-Felon
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 3,239
Mentioned: 226 Post(s)
Tagged: 9 Thread(s)
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
4 Won / 0 Lost
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ViTRiOL View Post
When Felons online i gets weak.
????????
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Unread 02-01-2013, 05:10 PM   #7
 
Mr-Felon
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 8.38/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
4 Won / 0 Lost
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Voted: 49 audio / 75 text
Posts: 3,239
Mentioned: 226 Post(s)
Tagged: 9 Thread(s)


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ViTRiOL View Post
When Felons online i gets weak.
????????
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  #8  
Unread 02-01-2013, 05:17 PM
RakishHeir
Basic Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
Default

... you know what's really weak? this felon ducking me like a bitch @ViTRiOL why not say something bout that.
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Unread 02-01-2013, 05:17 PM   #8
 
RakishHeir
Basic Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Voted: 0 audio / 0 text
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
Default

... you know what's really weak? this felon ducking me like a bitch @ViTRiOL why not say something bout that.
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  #9  
Unread 02-02-2013, 06:38 AM
ViTRiOL ViTRiOL is on FIRE! 5+ wins in a row!
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 2,394
Mentioned: 510 Post(s)
Tagged: 26 Thread(s)
Estimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 stars
Ranked Audio Record
11 Won / 4 Lost
Estimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
141 Won / 35 Lost
Default

You're both acting like bitches at the moment.
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"A man is the sum of his actions."
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Unread 02-02-2013, 06:38 AM   #9
 
ViTRiOL ViTRiOL is on FIRE! 5+ wins in a row!
Estimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.54/10 stars
Ranked Audio Record
11 Won / 4 Lost
Estimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.54/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.99/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
141 Won / 35 Lost
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Voted: 18 audio / 763 text
Posts: 2,394
Mentioned: 510 Post(s)
Tagged: 26 Thread(s)


Default

You're both acting like bitches at the moment.
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  #10  
Unread 02-02-2013, 07:25 AM
Streetz De Hood
Basic Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 3,164
Mentioned: 337 Post(s)
Tagged: 17 Thread(s)
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.94/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.94/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.94/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
86 Won / 7 Lost
Default

this thread is gay as hell so far. Never saw so many bad jokes on one page.
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Unread 02-02-2013, 07:25 AM   #10
 
Streetz De Hood
Basic Member
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.94/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.94/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.94/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
86 Won / 7 Lost
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Voted: 0 audio / 0 text
Posts: 3,164
Mentioned: 337 Post(s)
Tagged: 17 Thread(s)


Default

this thread is gay as hell so far. Never saw so many bad jokes on one page.
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