Writers Block Verse

[B U R D E N]

He Was Thee Creater Of The Creatures Around Like A God In Their Eyes, This God Of A Guy Was The Reason They Have Been Found So They Worshiped Their God Till They Die Never Spoke But Quick To A Sound!

He Was The Leader And The Meaning To It All For Years Doing Test Choicing The Weaker And The Strong If One Was Messed Up Then Next Up For Years He Knew Its Fucked Up But Never Cared If It Was Wrong

He Was Evil.. The Devil In Form On God's Earth Creating Things Not People From Doin Test And Work Finding Whos Right Some With Teeth Full Of Blood, Guts N More Some Stuck W/ Knifes N Brutal To The Core

He Was At One Time, In Charge Now These Creatures Taking Their Ground So He Was At One Time Large Now He In A Crowd And Not To Be Found So In A Way This God Has Gone Down While His Troops They March Through Towns!

He Was Proud ..At First When Shit Was Right But Now Its Like This God Has Found A Curse Thats Turned Around His Life Cuz The Ones He Made Now Go Insane And As One Become Loud Like Church With Kids And Wifes.

He Was Standing Tall When They Knew Nothing But Damn Now This Man Cant Walk At All Its Like Hes Chained Or Something He In A Room, White Walls Till He Becomes Insane And Afraid Of Somethin. Think

He Was Nothing And Thats What Happenes To Be Honest With You He Created Not One Monster But Few And Now He Has No Control And Dont Know What To Do Cause The More And More They Patrol The More Hes Screwed

He Was Their Father And Believed It Was Fix-able So He Gathered A Few Edibles And Farther He Went And Flew Knowing They Would Fallow Wasnt Poor Thinkin Its What He Planned Them To Do!!

He Was Quick.. Faster By All Means They Werent Smarter Then Their Master So Thats It, Its Time For Out Smarting So A House Of Brick Something They Cant Chew Through While They Are Starving! Lets Go

He Was Gaining Brains And Thoughts That Seemed Brilliant So With Weapons He Would Remain On Top So There He Was.. While They Were Starving He Was Untouched Thinking About Plans, Stay Back Or Should He Rush!?

He Was Sure These Suckers Were Mean But Sure Its Nothing A Knee To The Spleen Or Fist To The Cheek Cant Fix So He Was Quick To Pick Something That He Could Beat A Group Of Atleast 6 With!!

He Was Ready.. Bold, Arms Steady About To Face The Cold With A Weapon Deadly For Any Freak Wanting To Go He Knew He Plans And Where He Needed To Go So There Almost On Demand He Tore As The Wind Would Blow!

He Was Running.. Beating Teeth In On The Way At This Point He Was Having A Hell Of A Day So Till He Was At That Point He Was Fighting In Every Way Cause He Knew Where He Be He Be Safe For Couple Weeks He Could Stay!

He Was Fighting.. But So Were They And They Started Biting, Something Strange To Him So He Was Frightened And Started To Strike Again And They Didnt Like Him So He Decided Not To Stick Around And Stay

He Was There.. About Time So He Reached The Stairs And Doors Opened Way Wide He Rushed In Not Caring To Look Behind And Closed Home, Locked And He Roamed To Find The Nine To End His Life Cuz He'd Rather End His Own!

He Was Thankful.. Tired As Hell And Ready To Go, Heaven Or Hell He Was Steady To Blow Brains On The Bed And Watch The Lights Dime Out Slow As The Blood Pours From His Head The Outside Creatures Explode

He Was The Master.. The Key To It All So When He Was To Splatter His Brains On The Wall They No Longer Mattered And The Whole World Was Gone It Started By Test And Ended In A Dizaster.. They Creatures Fallowed Master And All Be Gone!

[B U R D E N]

He Was Thee Creater Of The Creatures Around Like A God In Their Eyes, This God Of A Guy Was The Reason They Have Been Found So They Worshiped Their God Till They Die Never Spoke But Quick To A Sound!

He Was The Leader And The Meaning To It All For Years Doing Test Choicing The Weaker And The Strong If One Was Messed Up Then Next Up For Years He Knew Its Fucked Up But Never Cared If It Was Wrong

He Was Evil.. The Devil In Form On God's Earth Creating Things Not People From Doin Test And Work Finding Whos Right Some With Teeth Full Of Blood, Guts N More Some Stuck W/ Knifes N Brutal To The Core

He Was At One Time, In Charge Now These Creatures Taking Their Ground So He Was At One Time Large Now He In A Crowd And Not To Be Found So In A Way This God Has Gone Down While His Troops They March Through Towns!

He Was Proud ..At First When Shit Was Right But Now Its Like This God Has Found A Curse Thats Turned Around His Life Cuz The Ones He Made Now Go Insane And As One Become Loud Like Church With Kids And Wifes.

He Was Standing Tall When They Knew Nothing But Damn Now This Man Cant Walk At All Its Like Hes Chained Or Something He In A Room, White Walls Till He Becomes Insane And Afraid Of Somethin. Think

He Was Nothing And Thats What Happenes To Be Honest With You He Created Not One Monster But Few And Now He Has No Control And Dont Know What To Do Cause The More And More They Patrol The More Hes Screwed

He Was Their Father And Believed It Was Fix-able So He Gathered A Few Edibles And Farther He Went And Flew Knowing They Would Fallow Wasnt Poor Thinkin Its What He Planned Them To Do!!

He Was Quick.. Faster By All Means They Werent Smarter Then Their Master So Thats It, Its Time For Out Smarting So A House Of Brick Something They Cant Chew Through While They Are Starving! Lets Go

He Was Gaining Brains And Thoughts That Seemed Brilliant So With Weapons He Would Remain On Top So There He Was.. While They Were Starving He Was Untouched Thinking About Plans, Stay Back Or Should He Rush!?

He Was Sure These Suckers Were Mean But Sure Its Nothing A Knee To The Spleen Or Fist To The Cheek Cant Fix So He Was Quick To Pick Something That He Could Beat A Group Of Atleast 6 With!!

He Was Ready.. Bold, Arms Steady About To Face The Cold With A Weapon Deadly For Any Freak Wanting To Go He Knew He Plans And Where He Needed To Go So There Almost On Demand He Tore As The Wind Would Blow!

He Was Running.. Beating Teeth In On The Way At This Point He Was Having A Hell Of A Day So Till He Was At That Point He Was Fighting In Every Way Cause He Knew Where He Be He Be Safe For Couple Weeks He Could Stay!

He Was Fighting.. But So Were They And They Started Biting, Something Strange To Him So He Was Frightened And Started To Strike Again And They Didnt Like Him So He Decided Not To Stick Around And Stay

He Was There.. About Time So He Reached The Stairs And Doors Opened Way Wide He Rushed In Not Caring To Look Behind And Closed Home, Locked And He Roamed To Find The Nine To End His Life Cuz He'd Rather End His Own!

He Was Thankful.. Tired As Hell And Ready To Go, Heaven Or Hell He Was Steady To Blow Brains On The Bed And Watch The Lights Dime Out Slow As The Blood Pours From His Head The Outside Creatures Explode

He Was The Master.. The Key To It All So When He Was To Splatter His Brains On The Wall They No Longer Mattered And The Whole World Was Gone It Started By Test And Ended In A Dizaster.. They Creatures Fallowed Master And All Be Gone!

[Melodic Aggression]

^^ his picture, vote will be coming soon.

[Melodic Aggression]

^^ his picture, vote will be coming soon.

[B U R D E N]

Yo Thanks Fams I Was Trying Figure That Shit Out

[B U R D E N]

Yo Thanks Fams I Was Trying Figure That Shit Out

[Melodic Aggression]

Rhyme Scheme - 4/10
The rhyme scheme was basic. It was very hard to follow your verse at some places. You showed an exceedingly average rhyming skill, nothing outstanding, but nothing terrible.

Poetic Techniques - 5/10
The poetic techniques you showed were nice, although the rhyme scheme wasn't perfect, a good flip on the picture was pretty good.

Significance - 3/10
I strongly think that you did not entirely pay attention to the little details in the picture. There is obviously a window separating him and the Zombies, and the Zombies were out to eat him, and not follow him.

Vocabulary - 2/10
The choice of words that you used were very simplistic, which stupefied the verse as a whole. I am not going to touch upon your grammar, but there is alot you need to fix, in the category.

Emotion - 6/10
I really felt it, I don't know why, it had a mixture of decent imagery and storytelling. If you can create an image in the readers mind, it is easier to get emotion points. IMO

Imagery - 5/10
Like I said before, the imagery was decent. I got a pretty good picture in my mind, while reading it; but it was not exactly clear.

Storytelling - 4.5/10
I usually don't hand out decimal points, but this was right on the line between 4 and 5. The progression was on-and-off, you lost me and some places, but other moments did make complete sense.

Ending - 5/10
I think you ended it well. It was just long enough to have a good opener, decent middle and good end. Nothing really stood out in the ending though.


Final score - 34.5/80

[Melodic Aggression]

Rhyme Scheme - 4/10
The rhyme scheme was basic. It was very hard to follow your verse at some places. You showed an exceedingly average rhyming skill, nothing outstanding, but nothing terrible.

Poetic Techniques - 5/10
The poetic techniques you showed were nice, although the rhyme scheme wasn't perfect, a good flip on the picture was pretty good.

Significance - 3/10
I strongly think that you did not entirely pay attention to the little details in the picture. There is obviously a window separating him and the Zombies, and the Zombies were out to eat him, and not follow him.

Vocabulary - 2/10
The choice of words that you used were very simplistic, which stupefied the verse as a whole. I am not going to touch upon your grammar, but there is alot you need to fix, in the category.

Emotion - 6/10
I really felt it, I don't know why, it had a mixture of decent imagery and storytelling. If you can create an image in the readers mind, it is easier to get emotion points. IMO

Imagery - 5/10
Like I said before, the imagery was decent. I got a pretty good picture in my mind, while reading it; but it was not exactly clear.

Storytelling - 4.5/10
I usually don't hand out decimal points, but this was right on the line between 4 and 5. The progression was on-and-off, you lost me and some places, but other moments did make complete sense.

Ending - 5/10
I think you ended it well. It was just long enough to have a good opener, decent middle and good end. Nothing really stood out in the ending though.


Final score - 34.5/80

[B U R D E N]

Real Talk, I Appreciate That Fams

[B U R D E N]

Real Talk, I Appreciate That Fams

Ok Writers Block ..


Rhyme Scheme - 5.5/10
Although You Weren't Too Complex It Was Easy To Understand What You Were Writing. I Have Seen Detailed Topicals And They Made No Sense At All. You Fit Right In The Middle But I Wish You Would Have Taken a Chance w/ Ya Verse Try Some Different Things .

Poetic Techniques - 5/10
Your Poetic Techniques Were Solid, You Had a Different Approach W/ Your Topic I Would Have Went a Different Route Honestly.

Significance - 4/10
I Disagree w/ Previous Vote I Think It Is All Bout Interpertation Of The Picture And How One Looks At It .. Not Ya Best Cat But You Attempted

Vocabulary - 3/10
Need To Up Ya Vocab Serious Too Basic ..

Emotion - 8/10
tbh I Could Feel Ya Emotion In This Piece .. You Did Put Some Effort Into And an Jus Didn't Throw Up No BS

Imagery - 6/10
Got Do a Better Job At Paintin The Picture

Storytelling - 5/10
The Story Was In an Out At Times Hard To Follow

Ending - 5.5/10
Ended Decent Started Off Better


Final score - 42.0/80

Ok Writers Block ..


Rhyme Scheme - 5.5/10
Although You Weren't Too Complex It Was Easy To Understand What You Were Writing. I Have Seen Detailed Topicals And They Made No Sense At All. You Fit Right In The Middle But I Wish You Would Have Taken a Chance w/ Ya Verse Try Some Different Things .

Poetic Techniques - 5/10
Your Poetic Techniques Were Solid, You Had a Different Approach W/ Your Topic I Would Have Went a Different Route Honestly.

Significance - 4/10
I Disagree w/ Previous Vote I Think It Is All Bout Interpertation Of The Picture And How One Looks At It .. Not Ya Best Cat But You Attempted

Vocabulary - 3/10
Need To Up Ya Vocab Serious Too Basic ..

Emotion - 8/10
tbh I Could Feel Ya Emotion In This Piece .. You Did Put Some Effort Into And an Jus Didn't Throw Up No BS

Imagery - 6/10
Got Do a Better Job At Paintin The Picture

Storytelling - 5/10
The Story Was In an Out At Times Hard To Follow

Ending - 5.5/10
Ended Decent Started Off Better


Final score - 42.0/80

[GRizzEAT]

40/80 Good Read

[GRizzEAT]

40/80 Good Read

[Melodic Aggression]

Total Score: 96.5/ 240

[Melodic Aggression]

Total Score: 96.5/ 240

[AfterThought]

AfterThought

Rhyme Scheme - 3.5/10
Was really lost at some parts in your verse, nothing too special about this.

Poetic Techniques - 6/10
You did paint the picture nicely & made it work, the rhyme issue could've made it better though.

Significance - 5/10
Generous rate, could've perfected some parts.

Vocabulary - 2/10
Vocabulary was really basic tbh, the level of grammar you use is a very effective factor in topicals.

Emotion - 5/10
Kind of managed to show it.

Imagery - 5/10
You kind of started moving the picture for me.

Storytelling - 3/10
Try making the lines more relevant to each other

Ending - 6/10
I actually think you did it pretty well, I liked it.

Final score - 35.5/80

[AfterThought]

AfterThought

Rhyme Scheme - 3.5/10
Was really lost at some parts in your verse, nothing too special about this.

Poetic Techniques - 6/10
You did paint the picture nicely & made it work, the rhyme issue could've made it better though.

Significance - 5/10
Generous rate, could've perfected some parts.

Vocabulary - 2/10
Vocabulary was really basic tbh, the level of grammar you use is a very effective factor in topicals.

Emotion - 5/10
Kind of managed to show it.

Imagery - 5/10
You kind of started moving the picture for me.

Storytelling - 3/10
Try making the lines more relevant to each other

Ending - 6/10
I actually think you did it pretty well, I liked it.

Final score - 35.5/80

[Melodic Aggression]

132 / 320.

And AfterThought HAD to vote on the only thread with over 7 comments.

[Melodic Aggression]

132 / 320.

And AfterThought HAD to vote on the only thread with over 7 comments.