The Library of Book
Give it a read and rate. Thanks.

Alrighty gotcha thanks for the update

I'm going to read them all tonight and decide the winner so who ever is posted by the time I read is who is in contention.

How long are you extending the topical tourney

Yeah sorry I started a lil late so I'm putting on final touches.

Make sure to get your topical in.

Hey fam, first cypher on here. Peep it and drop some feedback when you got a moment. It's a little long but bear with me:
http://www.letsbeef.com/cypher_detai...on=tb&id=61636

If the whole tournament runs smoothly, I am sure we will have a 2nd PJT some time.

You're right in the essence that my last line did seem a little out of place. It was really a result of something rather than a tie to the rest of it. My first two lines however held alot more meaning when looked at from a shallower aspect and a deeper aspect. But I definitely understand what you meant bu paint a clear picture. I really didn't think about the vocab as much as I should have and the literary devices didn't even occur to me lol. Please tell me I'll have a chance to redeem myself in the future lol

Gleaming dagger that betrays the heart
Pierce the core and accept the clouds
Living water scorches the forked tongue

Basically, your best vocabulary was gleaming & scorched which aren't high. You didn't use any literary devices. (Alliteration, repetition, personification, etc.) Except maybe the forked tounge representing a snake's tongue & a serpent is a form of Satan. If that was your intent? Also, I feel you didn't paint a clear picture. The blade piercing through the core to me means downward. Then it says accepting the clouds which means it's going upward. Then the water just comes out of nowhere. It didn't tie in with the rest of it.

Just my two cents.

http://www.letsbeef.com/cypher_detai...on=tb&id=61315

Thanks

Link me. I'm feeling too lazy right now to go find it... Lol.

Hey man what do you think I could've done better in that haiku

Thanks for the feedback fam

Thanks, fam.

Hey man congrats on the promotion

Yeah I feel you. It was really sort of a filler concept to connect someone shaking in fear, twitching , and a rabbit. I could see how that seems whack. It's kind of one of those lines that seems good until you really analyze it and see that it makes no sense. Thanks for that. Ill try harder next time

There is no way too. I just think the whole idea was wack to be honest. I mean I get it, but how does him being twitchy & fidgety like he was a rabbit in his past life have impact? How does it insult your opponent in a way that will impress the reader? You could have just as easily said like he was a squirrel in his past life. It's too vague & doesn't have an impact. You see what I'm saying?

Hey thanks for the feedback. What do you think would've been a better way to execute that rabbit line

It's a battle of who can produce the best poetry. You just want to make a better poem than your opponent.