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Adonai vs Dredd Tha Lead
8 Lines (4 Bars)
5 Votes 4.75 stars4.75 stars4.75 stars4.75 stars4.75 stars

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Text Ranked Battle
  Length: 8 Lines Blind Drop

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Reppin: Unknown

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Battle started: November 19th 2019 at 14:51
Challenger joined: December 31st 1969 at 19:00


Voting has ended for this battle (battle finished on 2019-11-19 23:21:15).


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Teets aka swanton

Both cane out with good shit , but zezmer came out a bit better , not trying say nothing to caked out but that second line sounded familiar with MER DUH shit still 

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Posted on: 2019-11-20 00:10:57 Private Message Teets aka swanton


So-so from both. Zezmer, it's obvious you're still elevating, and trying to better yourself at the craft. And you've got the fundamentals down relatively pat(your multis, for example, are pretty solid.) But, where you need to focus your efforts are the construction of punchlines, and using set ups as a means to build to them. And your wordplay. "an a traction?" This doesn't make grammatical sense, and so it comes off as a reach. This was your best structured punch, though. And I'd like to see more of this style of bar from you to help develop those categories. Cakedout, some hit or miss stuff here. I liked your opener. It was a solid example of nameplay, that was well executed. But, you began to sort of lose steam from there. The BBQ bar was okay, but very basic. It was the structure here, in this case, that edged this bar in comparison to your opponents, and not its creativity. The next set of lines were just filler. The darts line was bland, and didn't have any real substance. And the zebra bar was rather poor to me, as well. Not nearly as well executed as your opener. That said, I have to give this to the verse that had better use of punchline structure, that had a conceptual basis and built to the punch based on that. 

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Posted on: 2019-11-24 12:44:31 Private Message REZN

 

 
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