Originally Posted by Dono

Here's a real effort. Red Myst made the beat and I mixed it myself, which I haven't really done much of before.

Lets Beef Track: SonShine (Prod. By Red Myst) - By: Dono

If you're still not feelin it then feel free to delete this out the thread as well and I'll stay out for good. Take it easy.

all i ask for is effort

BEAT hahaha yo this shit cracked me up from the first note. this shit was like the sex scene in an 80s sci fi film. with that said, i loved it...

PERFORMANCE man you were chasing the beat the whole time. i didn't hear you sit inside the pocket of this beat once. and your voice drops out a lot makes it hard to hear you. and the last syllables you say in your lines just drift off into space more often then not. 'fightin onnn'. just holding that onn a little bit too long (just one example. another example, whats 'rigght or wroongg') it makes it sound like your searching for the beat. a great performance would be a performer that knows the beat so well they effortlessly sit inside it, as if unaware of it (coming out of the rhythm whenever but always coming right back in). that kinda performance makes it sound like the beat was crafted around the lyric. your performance had the opposite effect

PRODUCTION no good, the second you start rapping this shit gets waaay to cluttered. im realizing this beat isnt great to rap on, its too busy. you didn't really have anywhere to go, may attest to your forced performance. your vocal also is flat, eq that shit. figure out what aspects of your voice you want to accent and eq it higher or lower.

LYRIC the lyric was actually great. i feel bad you wrote such a great lyric for a song that really didn't work out. probably got pumped when u put that on paper... BUT. im speaking about your words. your words were good. rhythmically this lyric is preeeetty bad


OVERALL this beat is hilariously dramatic. so much so that i would enjoy it as just an instrumental. just like i would enjoy your lyric if solo, on paper. these two things combined made one nasty musical cluster fuck peppered with flat, forced vocals. the ingredients were good, the cocktail was gross. 4

Originally Posted by Dono

Here's a real effort. Red Myst made the beat and I mixed it myself, which I haven't really done much of before.

Lets Beef Track: SonShine (Prod. By Red Myst) - By: Dono

If you're still not feelin it then feel free to delete this out the thread as well and I'll stay out for good. Take it easy.

all i ask for is effort

BEAT hahaha yo this shit cracked me up from the first note. this shit was like the sex scene in an 80s sci fi film. with that said, i loved it...

PERFORMANCE man you were chasing the beat the whole time. i didn't hear you sit inside the pocket of this beat once. and your voice drops out a lot makes it hard to hear you. and the last syllables you say in your lines just drift off into space more often then not. 'fightin onnn'. just holding that onn a little bit too long (just one example. another example, whats 'rigght or wroongg') it makes it sound like your searching for the beat. a great performance would be a performer that knows the beat so well they effortlessly sit inside it, as if unaware of it (coming out of the rhythm whenever but always coming right back in). that kinda performance makes it sound like the beat was crafted around the lyric. your performance had the opposite effect

PRODUCTION no good, the second you start rapping this shit gets waaay to cluttered. im realizing this beat isnt great to rap on, its too busy. you didn't really have anywhere to go, may attest to your forced performance. your vocal also is flat, eq that shit. figure out what aspects of your voice you want to accent and eq it higher or lower.

LYRIC the lyric was actually great. i feel bad you wrote such a great lyric for a song that really didn't work out. probably got pumped when u put that on paper... BUT. im speaking about your words. your words were good. rhythmically this lyric is preeeetty bad


OVERALL this beat is hilariously dramatic. so much so that i would enjoy it as just an instrumental. just like i would enjoy your lyric if solo, on paper. these two things combined made one nasty musical cluster fuck peppered with flat, forced vocals. the ingredients were good, the cocktail was gross. 4