Lets Beef - Battle Rap Forums - View Single Post - ATT 2018 ROUND 2: Writer 15 vs Writer 7 [Writer 7 wins via no-show]

**The Ghost of Freak** · #4 03-27-2018, 10:40 AM

I thought the formatting was interesting. I felt the past and present were a little less clear than the future section. There were a couple of lines with present tense in the past. I felt the sociopolitical commentary angle was fine, but maybe having more narrative would have enriched the sections. Possibly framing the commentary from the perspective of a character or multiple characters. Not too shabby. Keep up the good work.

**The Ghost of Freak** · 03-27-2018, 10:40 AM

I thought the formatting was interesting. I felt the past and present were a little less clear than the future section. There were a couple of lines with present tense in the past. I felt the sociopolitical commentary angle was fine, but maybe having more narrative would have enriched the sections. Possibly framing the commentary from the perspective of a character or multiple characters. Not too shabby. Keep up the good work.

03-27-2018, 10:40 AM	#4
The Ghost of Freak Ranked Audio Record 124 Won / 135 Lost Ranked Text Record 22 Won / 29 Lost Join Date: Oct 2011 Voted: 481 audio / 231 text Posts: 1,066 Mentioned: 560 Post(s) Tagged: 27 Thread(s)	I thought the formatting was interesting. I felt the past and present were a little less clear than the future section. There were a couple of lines with present tense in the past. I felt the sociopolitical commentary angle was fine, but maybe having more narrative would have enriched the sections. Possibly framing the commentary from the perspective of a character or multiple characters. Not too shabby. Keep up the good work. __________________ ...and I love you too.
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