Quote:
Originally Posted by Shodan
"I've been hearing voices" who SAY YOU'RE BITING HELLA SCRIPTS, you MAY DENY THE EVIDENCE but we see “ya strait jack-it, under wraps" like inSANE ASYLUM RESIDENTS who STAY CONFINED reSTRAINED INSIDE PROTECTIVE RIGS / Peeps who "Couldn't figure out the proof?" Should "PRACTICE DOING ADVANCED MATH," cause if "The Evidence Shows Row-Di'nt Bite", THAT’S A CLUE FROM SOME PACK RATS "Shape Up or Ship Out", "You couldn't move into my weight class" as a "TRANSFER STUDENT IN FAT CAMP!!!!” / You'll send me forced concepts then get de-PRESSED WHEN YOU’RE DEFEATED, N’ "Know light setups reflect on your failures" like "SELF CRITICAL PEOPLE WHEN they CHECK MIRRORS TO SEE THEIR SKIN!!!!” So “If he thinks he’s ill? I’ll lay hands on him,” this CLOWN’S NEXT TO CATCH A FIST, "God knows, I’ll handle this snake" like “deVOUT PRESBYTERIANS” / I'm an LBT card-topper, several-stints-in-the-finals while this NERD STAYED BASIC, we won't "Mention-him-with-a-title" you aren’t on a "FIRST NAME BASIS!” / Imitating the best is what this WORTHLESS FAGGOT TRIES TO DO, but as for heavyweights, Voters know their VERSES SMASH YOUR LINES IN TWO, Name your favorites & I'll humiliate them online...if we see "This herb'll tea-bag on the men-u list" someone “ORDERED CHAMOMILE BREWS!!”
https://www.letsbeef.com/battle_deta...n=tb&id=500338 |
Shodan, whats good man. Cool lil verse here pimp, you def have the structure down, which is one of the hardest things to learn in battle rap. For the most part the structure was good down to the closer where you stretched the line/multi sets between verses smash your lines in two..... and ... ordered camomile brews... The multis also didnt match up syllable wise which is a costly mistake when texting. It also ordered and verses doesnt rhyme at all, so watch that. These are all mistakes that can be fixed rather easy, but what needs to take place here is more creative concepts. Keep the formula/structure, just read some of your favorite texters, and your creativity will go up.
Overall with those mistakes i saw in this battle, with a very solid structure, you are a very strong Lightweight, that is on his way to transitioning to Middleweight. Keep grinding bro.