I need some honest help
 

I dunno apparently i'm missing something in my battles, i don't see it but other people do, i just want some honest feedback how to improve my battles. p.s if you're gonna be a douche don't bother. :high:

Drop a quick verse, I'll critique it for you to the best of my knowledge.

Damn nigga u been here since 07' u askin for help now??? SMH.

lol i only really came back to lb a couple in like september sort of. i din't touch it for ages before then. and siccness just peep my hotlist wit Kyle_

twist... ur shit is deep bro.. we've battled before

i think that u been around for so long that ur tryna fuse tha old shit n tha new swag.
jx let it go bro. kp ya trains of thought, jx try to strutucre it different, n also try to think of one or two HEAD TURNING punches to throw in there.

ur gud

imo.......

Well, I dont want to quote your verse, and break it down, might be considered as swaying so, holla at me when that battle closes, I'll tell you what I think you should do, moving forward.

cheers famo, iunno i'm just doubtin it lately coz i been losing to even basic cats.

aight siccness cheers man.

its closed

as he cleans his sniper laughing his head off ^^^

No offense to your squad, but you'll only build to their level. Maybe its time to get with a crew who will push you to succeed. You need to be self style, your lyrics arent THAT off, you just lack confidence.

if ya want honest feedback

your style and structure is very hard to follow for reading..
some lines could have been real nice.. like the recylcing can line in your battle w/ Kyle
but it didn't have much of a set up and

def work on having a smoother flow before anything else!!

If you can make your lines smoother and the flow better it can turn a mediocre concept into an above average punch!!


It also might help if you think of one good punch.. and take the multi's that consist in that punch and build around it w/ another punch or a set up, instead of just writing one multi/rhyme after the other!!

but def. in my opinion
make sure you fix your structure and flow before you try and create the huge punches or add in wordplay and more complexity cuz those all won't work without the other 2..

add my msn!! iamflow@live.com

lol for some reason i can actually help people improve more than i can myself.. so if ya wanna work on shit hit me up

^^ahaha yea it always seems easier that way