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::Rupt's Rap School:: Volume 1.1 (first day of school)
RUPT'S RAP SCHOOL VOLUME 1.1 (WEEK ONE INTRODUCTION AND SYLLABUS)
Class is in session!! I think we have a couple Classick members in this joint too lol *****NEW ASSISTANT TEACHER POSITION FILLED*********** yall welcome @Phroxen as your assistant teacher... he will be taking on the task of rating verses aswell! He's been doing this a long time, doesnt have many battles on here but his opinion is warranted.... Welcome Yo! View Phroxens page here ... http://www.letsbeef.com/forums/member.php?u=886389 Ait so I outlined the basics in the Intro thread ... Here.. http://www.letsbeef.com/forums/showthread.php?t=124556 Basically Emcees wonder why they are underrated to some of the best writers on the site... its mainly because you have one thing... but missing another.. Let me help you with that... To ultimately help create the most well rounded text/Audio battlers on the site. I see alot of potential already, some cats that are on the peak of bein some of the best. The object is to create a dope punch... but NOT FORGETTING about the build n delivery.... The best way i can describe this is to give an example from an emcee that is top five ever on the site and arguably one of the most well rounded texters of all time... this weeks ex. is from @reEFer ... Grand Champion and future HOF. http://www.letsbeef.com/battle_detai...n=tb&id=399803 vs Daddio Start TELLIN ME HOW any of thats RELEVANT NOW??/ ..like the fact every time you SEND BATTLEs it GETs WACKER, never DID HAVE THE "IT"-FACTOR' ..your jus one 'HELL OF A CLOWN'!!/ I been had this TORCH THAT im LIFTING, beFORE the 'OLYMPICS' my 'METAL was-ROUND'.. but fuck pistols, id rather LEVEL HIS TOWN.. map his casa out & fire scud missles "on-the-house", 'giving EVERYONE ROUNDS'!!!/ now the punch itself was good, not the best from reef but prettty damn good, what makes him so good is his builds, n multis... flow is smooth, the inner multis is what sets him apart from textcees with only punches... so with that said... this rounds concept will be somthing easy to start the week... WEEK 1 CONCEPT ::: ALCOHOL ... this can be beer products, drinks, anything, even rubbing alcohol... just as long as its the concept... the build can have a concept of your own thrown in there as long as the last bar is on topic.. **It is encouraged to try to keep the entire bar as relevant as possible to acquire a higher average. ALL ENTRIES MUST BE 4 LINES.. AROUND THE SIZE THAT WAS POSTED IN THE EXAMPLE BARS BY REEF. The students... --SENIORS--(85 percent average for 3 consecutive weeks.) 1. JUNIORS--(80 percent average for 3 consecutive weeks.) 1. --SOPHOMORES--(75 percent average for 2 consecutive weeks.) 1. --FRESHMAN--(New students, and students with a class average lower than 75 percent) 1.@Jimmy Dean™-expelled due to missing this weeks class. 2. @MadVerbs 3.@Mind Fuck 4.@Path-2wk suspension 5.@Enfinite 6.@EDS 7.@Molly 8.@BLNK 9.@InZane123 10.@Phoenix 11.@Xplissit-Checking to see when the last time he was active... pending expulsion 12.@SpookyDeep 13.@Unyqe 14.@FiNAL WoRD 15.@~SHINIGAMI~ You will be judged on a scale from 1-10. Each category will be givin a rate.. .Flow .Delivery/swag .Multis .Punches .Readablility .Entire bar relevance then the mean score will be calculated.. I will be keeping track of who is the top student making changes every week.... A special award will be givin to the most improved and top ranked writers at the end of week 5. Bars are due by tuesday Nov 27 Midnight Est time! You will have 3 days to post your bars from the day the week starts.. each day after that (for a 7 day total) you will be deducted 5 points from your score. *****Graduation*** -In order to graduate, a student must maintain an 85 percent mean score for a consecutive 3 weeks. The Exam follows... AFTER THE THREE WEEK PERIOD IS OVER.... YOU WILL THEN GET TO BATTLE YOUR PROFESSOR IN ANY FORMAT THAT YOU CHOOSE TO SEND.... SCORE ATLEAST 40 PERCENT OF THE VOTES IN ORDER TO GRADUATE FROM RAP SCHOOL. ****Rules and Regulations**** -MISS ONE WEEK OF SCHOOL WITHOUT A DOCTERS NOTE AND YOU WILL BE EXPELLED FROM RAP SCHOOL. *YOU GET A DOCTERS NOTE BY NOT LOGGING ON FOR THE TIME THAT WEEK HAS STARTED TO THE TIME IT ENDS.* -AFTER RATINGS ARE GIVEN DO NOT QUESTION THE PROFESSORS RATES/GRADES AN EXCESSIVE AMOUNT. ARGUING OR GETTING OUT OF LINE IN ANY WAY WILL ONCE AGAIN GET YOU EXPELLED. Lets elevate and have fun at the same time! Goodluck to everyone. The Professor, Rupt |
Post your bars in this thread when finished for a rating and breakdown.
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He's trying to "Kick It" but hasn't mastered the hand motions, that means he won't keep those "Two Arms Together" if he were acting out hand holding. Homie's a queer, he'll start showing his fear... Backing down, then bolting. So if he don't wanna "Be 'Ere" then I'm 'Cracking The Can Open.'(Beer.)
Edit: @Erupt. In. |
I'll 'intoxicate your mind' n take over I'm the MESSIAH,SCARY DWELLER 'reprobate you outta society' you a PARIAH, WARY FELLER punches make his 'brain mellow' dna over the place leave u a slain fellow n make ur soul 'spirits of wine' like MARIAH CAREY CELLAR
This is prolly bad but yeah I'll wait for feedback. |
My divine punches produce ALE'S/L'S I KEEP EXPORTED so I stay MAILIN' THESE FOOLS MORE CLIPS, so 'wine' n my 'cantina/can 'Tina' will DAMAGE FOLKS sending the HAMMER LOW/HAM 'MERLOT' when SPILLED IT LEAVES THE FLOOR RED!!
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'Fuck Politics'..ya Chick's TWERKIN' HER HOLE 'WORKIN' THA POLLS', lettin' APES SPRAY SEAMEN n Fuck an 'ARGU-MENT' I'll turn ya 'PARTY RED' if you 'DeBATE ZANE'S SPEAKIN' // Ya RHYMIN'-AIN'T-HOT so if you 'WINE-N-TAKE-SHOTS' then I'll STRAIGHT A BEAT HIM! YA GUYS? THEY'LL SHOUT ABUSE 'til ya "ConFIDING 'BOUT THE BOO'S" like FINDING OUT THE TRUTH in an "A.A MEETIN'!"..
@Erupt |
Good shit gettin these in early, wish yall woulda took a little more time with these, gonna make me sound like a dick lol... Good shit tho, ratings will be in after a few more come in.
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You could'nt bare to get a meal-ticket on a LUNCH TRUCK..DUMB FUCK, & Forget how your HEATS SCORCHIN & how you "Tossing Cans" like STEVE AUSTIN cos I'll just give Rib shots that make "Core's Light" up til you PUNCH DRUNK!!
lmaoooo bored'em made me do it .... key'd |
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---------- Post added at 12:27 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:23 AM ---------- Im not exceeding 15 students tho, if a person misses a class then I'll find someone to replace them..... they'll be behind... and be missing out on points earned each week, but catching up is possible, I can say from what I've seen so far noones scored higher than a C ... |
It'd be cool to get a full breakdown.
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---------- Post added at 06:53 AM ---------- Previous post was at 05:55 AM ---------- ****************CHANGES HAVE BEEN MADE TO THE SYLLABUS! INCLUDING HOW TO GRADUATE FROM RAP SCHOOL AND MORE!*************** |
nah rupt i was just bored lol
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Like heads or a "beer?" I "STILL CRACK OPEN" KILL RAP NOISES, cause if its snakes in the grass?you "STILL LACK POISON!" bite a rap? You DRILL BACK FOAMIN, for that bread you need, sober up. Get shot. Too REAL? BLACK...TOASTED! Try n STEAL THAT FLOW ISH? you can beg when I grab your leg. Pertend it's a keg, my MEALS TAPPED FLOWING.
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---------- Post added at 02:17 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:16 PM ---------- Deadlines 2mrw, ill begin rates after that .. |
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ait im only interested in cats who really want to elevate, theres only 2 spots left and they about to be filled quick my nig! If you arnt interested now, im sure someone will slip up, or not showup one week, and if you like how the school is looking then you can holla , if a position opens.
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I keep my "Bars Open" for any ballers willin' to TAKE THE SHOTS, and guaranteed the "heat sensation" that'll leave these rookies with a bitter face as if they TASTED SCOTCH! I FOLD-CATS for everything I bring is COKE-JACK. see how you clowns be TALKIN' TOO SOON cuz if this PRO-SNAP/SCHNAPP the "Punch" will give ya a "WALK ON THE MOON"
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If this is still open im taking it and i will write, right away
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Ait go ahead, you got till 2mrw night... make it hot... pleeaasssee.. :/
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Enfinite is notorious for turning in homework late.
I'll be posting tomorrow. |
*******NEW ASSISTANT TEACHER*********** Yall welcome @Phroxen !
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/bows
Let's bring it, kids. Don't disappoint. ;) |
^^ Great.
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1.@Jimmy Dean™
2. @MadVerbs 3.@Mind Fuck 5.@Enfinite 7.@Molly 11.@Xplissit 12.@SpookyDeep- Gets a pass because his laptops fucked. 14.@FiNAL WoRD You have till tonight to post, after that 5 points will be deducted from your grade for every day late..... If its not in by the end of this weeks grading period which is Friday... then you will be the first to be expelled from Rap school... And someone else will take your place until you show more interest in improving. Rupt |
@Erupt
Ayo, you claim that you can ''Handle Your Own'' ..then it should take LOTS TO DROP YA so why are you always that ''Drunk Bitch Under The Table'' from a few SHOTS OF VODKA!? Just typed it up real quick, my bad for it not being my best. I'll log on later to type the other bar, just got on for a min to check things out & figured I should at least get one typed. If you think that you'll WIN YOU'RE DUMB & stop talking money because you've BEEN A BUM & with ''Shots I'll Leave You Lit'' ..you're not drinking GIN OR RUM! |
K. Just a second give me 3 minutes.
---------- Post added at 05:05 PM ---------- Previous post was at 04:57 PM ---------- This clown needs to 'chill-out'! like SKIING ATTIRE.. just FLEXXIN like he's MEAN and does more 'IMPRESSIONS in the RING' than a C.Z. DeSIGNER/ His 8 line battles? the READING IS FIRE.. for HALF THE DROP, THEN GETS WEAK! so if he 'HAS A SHOT, w/ SIX-TEENS' he was DRINKING WITH MINORS!!!/ Cz is cubic zirconia btw.. |
ayyy whassupp Molly , glad you could join us
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Wassup boss. U know I couldn't lose five points. Schools important lol
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Aight, bars are posted. |
ud 'do anything for a high'', one day you'll Drown-in-vomit so stop n think, u aint never workin shit aint 'Never earned a chip', he aint never bin Proud at all his accomplishments? nahh! hes always 'lookin for sympathy in the bars' that he Drown all his sob Sorrows in..but my shots are piff, its like a Mouth of chronic/a shot of criss with a remaining ounce of pot pitched after you down a shot wit vodka its!, gottem 'throwin back at random' now hes 'In need of help'...alcoholics anonymous
@Erupt , shup shuuuun |
A -shot? What you WANT W/ FUCK?? Thought that you was weiser cause your BUZZING BUD.. guess I'll show you WHAT IS UP when showing you your 'too titty' to duke wit me bringing new meaning to DOUBLE CUPPED//
@Erupt GONZO |
Your "bars were weak off the launch" and NEVA LANDED, you'll drop like HARD LIQUOR when "Shots drop" from bad "BAR" TENDERS, face it, a simple "90 degree flip of the wrist" won't make this battle LEVEL HANDED!!!
Meh, @Erupt Here's somethin. |
@Erupt when do grades go in professor?
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Edit: --------WEEK ONE GRADES------ (Will go here) Quote:
Ale's / L's .. ehhh i guess it works sorta, but you could find wayyy better wording... so I stay MAILIN' THESE FOOLS MORE CLIPS .... read that aloud, does the wording sound forced to you? its pretty forced man, and youre Mailing fools clips? I get what youre saying, that youre exporting clips but how does that pertain to your opponent, what you gonna hurt him because he is going to recieve clips via the mail? lol nah man, doesnt work.... so 'wine' n my 'cantina/can 'Tina' will DAMAGE FOLKS sending the HAMMER LOW/HAM 'MERLOT' when SPILLED IT LEAVES THE FLOOR RED the first part about the wine is straight... i guess you named your can tina...? lol its a little forced but better than everything else. you have a HAM MERLOT? WHAT? lol so youre trying to say your Merlot is going Ham i get it but why are you sending your hammer low? lol The wordplay was real iffy in this..... the multis were also suspect.. forced at times... delivery wasnt bad but needs a lot of work.... readability isnt really bad but its not good because of the forced multis... Teachers Advice Okay so its deff your freshman year, My advice to you is to stick to simpler concepts, and read your stuff aloud to make sure it reads smoothly, Use simpler multis, somtimes you have to take a step back to take one forward. Rating .Flow-4 .Delivery/swag-4 .Multis-4 .Punches-4 .Readablility-4 .Entire bar relevance -8 ... although the concepts were horrible, the relevance was good you stayed on point with that. SO good job with that. Mean Score You scored 47% on this weeks test. And Failed. Use the advice I gave to get a better score next week! Quote:
... the straight A part was a lil forced, but that wasnt the issue, it was the word choice, the first part of the bar you were talking to him, then at the end you were talking about him, messed up the flow, try to either talk to the opponent or about the opponent when writing a line. Multis-8- you did a good job with the multis, try to match the syllables a lil more, and your grade will go higher. good job with this! Delivery--7 .. was good... but what messed you up was what i mentioned above that little slip up, def not a bad delivery tho. Punches-6 both punches were average punches, nothing complex at all, could have done better in this category, read some of the doper text heads to get an idea of how to move forward, think outside the box.. your score went up due to the fact you had more than one punch... but the two didnt coincide. [B]Readability-7- Was actually pretty good, I wouldnt cap so many words tho, if you could lower case the inner multis that might help for a smoother read. Entire Bar Relevance - 5- Overall I like the fact you put a punch in, but the beginning didnt coincide with the last bars... the subject was alcohol.. try to make the bar stay on topic the whole way through. This weeks grade - 68% - not bad, its a D but still not good enuff to graduate from the freshman class. Use my tips for next week to move forward! I like what im seeing so far tho. Teachers Advice Dont cap all the multis, the reader will pick up on it , this will help for a smoother flow until you master them. The inner multis I wouldnt cap. Also, when you get time read some of the better textcees verses, or better yet, since youre an audio head ... watch this guy named, Heartless , on youtube, he is very creative. Quote:
.Delivery/wording- 3-Once again see above the wording was off due to the choice of words, and the space between multi to multi in the last line made it not hit. .Multis-4 Multis did match, but werent the best selection, and they were few and far between. .Punches-5-there were punches in this , nothing too strong but they were there,, .Readablility-6 once again this is a flow problem... it wasnt too much clutter, .Entire bar relevance -4 your first bar had nothing to do with the topic, if you want to add punches to a bar, try to make them connect on topic with the last bar. Grade - 41% Teachers Advice Work on not forcing the multis, if it doesnt read smooth to you, then cross it out, try to stay on topic with the topic the entire bar, dont have soo much space between multi and multi. Quote:
.Delivery/wording-4- the delivery wasnt bad but the wording was terrible, mainly due to word choice.... REAL? BLACK...TOASTED!....Pertend it's a keg, my MEALS TAPPED FLOWING. i get the punch... but the way it was worded was bad... the word choice was bad which messed up the delivery .Multis-5- Once again there were alot of multis but alot of them were forced... try not to force them, read it aloud to make sure it makes sense .Punches- 5- there were punches,but they werent that dope, keep up the same consistancy, but try to be a little more direct. .Readablility-4 the readability wasnt bad,but the way the multis flow messed up the read. .Entire bar relevance-7 i noticed you stayed on topic for the most part, good job, Grade- 48% Teachers Advice work on not forcing the multis... read it aloud... lose some of the designs... good job staying on topic... try not to force a concept. READ IT ALOUD. Quote:
.Delivery/swag-6 delivery was decent, what messed up your score is the delivery on the last bar... the multis werent set up right for it to hit with its full effect. .Multis-7- multis were there... try to use more extensive multi sets, that will boost ya score. .Punches-5-the punches werent great, the sympathy behind his bars punch was actually better than the alcohol anon punch..... if you can i would lose the "....." before you got to that punch... it just seems like you cant find a way to word it properly. .Readablility- 7-once again find a better way to seperate the main multis, that comes with delivery, other than that it was decent. .Entire bar relevance -9 - you did a great job with this, the entire bar almost was relevent...... GOOD JOB. Grade-68% + 5pts extra credit... 73% Teachers Advice Work on structure, so that it reads smoother if you plan to not cap your multis... Try to use longer multi sets, up the creativity of the punches, also try to fix the delivery to maximize the impact of the punch. [quote=Mind Fuck;864346]A -shot? What you WANT W/ FUCK?? Thought that you was weiser cause your BUZZING BUD.. guess I'll show you WHAT IS UP when showing you your 'too titty' to duke wit me bringing new meaning to DOUBLE CUPPED// @Erupt Flow- 8- ait flow was smooth, was a smooth read. .Delivery/swag-8 delivery was good, i would have added another multi set to the last bar to make it hit harder...... .Multis-6-multis were there mainly in the last bar, bud lets try to use longer multi sets, the set you used here was 2 syllables, the middle of it didnt rhyme, use atleast 3 rhyming syllables in a text verse. .Punches- 7-Punches were there, first was worded good, good job by adding two in there, they werent exactly heavyweight tho, still decent. .Readablility-8 very readable verse here... had no problem with that.. .Entire bar relevance - 9 you stayed on point with this. Grade-77% - GREAT JOB! ONE MORE SCORE OVER 75 PERCENT AND YOU GRADUATE FROM THE FRESHMAN CLASS! Teachers Advice Use longer multi sets, try to incorporate more of an audio flow with the inner multis, up the creativity, also work on the delivery, knowing when and where to place multis to make them hit harder. Quote:
.Delivery/swag-7-delivery was good, could have been better on the last line, .Multis-8-multis were there, and actually pretty damn good .Punches-7- the opener was better than the closer, the closer was a little mediocre for my taste .Readablility- 9 , it was very readable .Entire bar relevance 6- first bar didnt relate to the subject at hand , try to stay on topic for the whole time Grade-77%- Great job! one more week over 75% and you will advance into sophomore status! Teachers Advice What took away from your punch score was the fact it didnt relate to the entire bar..... thats what hurt your score here... multis were good, add a little more of an audio feel to them and you will be right there.... Keep the entire bar on point! |
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[Delivery]: 6/10 - You showed some confidence, but nothing overly aggressive. [Multis]: 7/10 - This would've scored higher, but there were a few flaws I noticed. One being "backing down then bolting" doesn't match the syllable count for the rest of your scheme.. also the slant rhymes were very slanted which sounded alright but requires far less effort. "Homie's a queer" was just filler to both have an internal scheme and attempt a setup for more use of the main scheme but it was lazily worded. [Punches]: 5/10 - Both punches needed work, specifically with execution. The first (arms / hand) had a good concept, but telling someone they won't keep two arms together isn't a powerful diss at all. The last (beer / can) was just awkward. Be 'ere =/= Beer.. and on top of that, the wording you used to describe what I'm assuming is hitting his head was poor. [Readability]: 7/10 - Up until the mismatched main scheme in the middle and the Beer wordplay, I was feeling it.. then it began to read a bit weird. When the flaws are so apparent like that, especially near the end, it takes steam away from your entire bar. [Entire bar relevance]: 6/10 - The topic was mentioned once in the end, and it seemed as if it was just slipped in as a last resort to tie in the topic. [Additional Tips]: Be more concise. I know you like to use correct grammar and all that... but get your points across a little sooner in the bar. Also, NEVER force wordplay... you usually excel in that department, but "Be 'Ere" was wack. Straight up. Also, take a little more time on your internal schemes.. don't just add them to add them. [GRADE]: 62% Quote:
[Delivery]: 5/10 - Average. [Multis]: 5/10 - The syllable count was solid and everything rhymed, but the vocabulary was extremely limited. You used "tha" twice and "ah" twice.. honestly those were all filler rhymes with no impact. [Punches]: 4/10 - Below average punch here. Go down faster than an Italian Lick her spot.. really, what the hell is that referencing? Not only was the wording weird, but the actual punch had zero sting. [Readability]: 6/10 - It was a clear read but it seemed too remedial for a score higher than slightly above average. [Entire bar relevance]: 5/10 - The topic was mentioned once, at the end.. while the setups had little to do with the topic, especially the entire first half (everything before "pick tha shot"). [Additional Tips]: Put more thought into your schemes. Your flow is on point, but the actual rhyming words were very weak. Also, avoid empty disses like "prick" in your schemes because they're regarded as filler. Read your wordplay aloud after you write it and make sure it reads correctly for both meanings, not just one. [GRADE]: 55% Quote:
[Delivery]: 6/10 - Decent confidence but nothing game-ending. [Multis]: 5/10 - Work on the vocabulary in your schemes because it seemed too simple. Also snap =/= Schnapps.. they don't even rhyme, nor do they even sound similar. (Schnapps rhymes with pops, tops, cops, stops, etc..) [Punches]: 5/10 - Open bars and taking shots did nothing for me. Same with the scotch line.. heat sensation giving bitter faces? Nah. The Coke/Jack needed a better setup for it to do damage, and the last bar also had a very weak setup for a punch that did next to no damage. [Readability]: 5/10 - A few mistakes cost you here. First, the snap/Schnapps thing was a total eye-sore. "guranteed the heat sensation that'll leave these rookies with a bitter face" - That's fragmented and doesn't make sense as is, plus rookies is plural so they'd have faces, not one face. "for everything I bring" - This sounded way too proper considering you're using slang like clowns, baller, and coke.. then you pull some Shakespearean type shit when you said "for everything". [Entire bar relevance]: 7/10 - Tons of references in your bars to the topic, even if they didn't connect, they were there and effort was shown. [Additional Tips]: Be careful with what you put in quotations.. people expect wordplay to be in quotes, and when it isn't it takes a lot of focus off of your bar. Also, make sure you know your voice when you're writing (or spitting). What I mean by that is... if you want to use slang like "clowns be talkin" then write your whole verse with that voice.. switching mid bar and speaking properly looks weird. [GRADE]: 55% Quote:
[Delivery]: 4/10 - Below average. When you attemped to be aggresive it just sounded awkward. [Multis]: 5/10 - Up the vocab. Everything rhymed but it lacked complexity.. try throwing in some inner schemes along with your main schemes. [Punches]: 4/10 - Below average. "handle your own" and "drunk bitch under the table" don't deserve quotes because they aren't referencing anything else. The "lit" punch, though it made sense, was far too simple to have an impact. [Readability]: 5/10 - Average. No grammatical or structural flaws but it was too verbose as I mentioned earlier. [Entire bar relevance]: 5/10 - You had the ideas but they just weren't executed well. [Additional Tips]: Don't use the first punch that comes to mind because it usually won't be as good as the next one(s) you think of. Also, keep wordplay in quotes and everything else out of them. [GRADE]: 45% Quote:
[Delivery]: 4/10 - The thoughts seemed sporadic, and nothing left a lasting impression. [Multis]: 4/10 - Only four examples here, one of which needed a different pronunciation to even work (neva). [Punches]: 3/10 - Your first punch applies to your own line, because that didn't land either.. there was no setup to allow it to make any sense. You used drop in your setup in the next line to describe "shots drop"... that's a double no-no. And defining what level handed means by saying your wrist turns was just awful. Not good at all. [Readablility]: 4/10 - "bars were weak off the launch and never landed" was just a forced way to start your bar. You were grasping for an idea that wasn't there. The double-drop usage I mentioned earlier was cringe-worthy. The last idea was also forced.. this was hard to get through. [Entire bar relevance]: 4/10 - You had ideas, and tried to incorporate the topic.. but as far as relevance goes, this was all over the place. [Additional Tips]: Work on the structure of your bars. Like I said, when your scheme starts in one bar and isn't seen until the next one, with nothing to connect them, you will lose the reader. Also, try not to use the same word twice in a bar (or in a verse for that matter). There are tons of words to choose from... don't pigeon-hole yourself. [GRADE]: 36% |
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Crack-ing-the-can-o-pen
Back-ing-down-then-bolt-ing. The syllables match? :S It's the annunciation that doesn't match. The sounds of the syllables, if you will. Then having the short I sound, where as the rest of the set had the long a sound. |
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