Wigsplit Vs Lizman (Wigsplit Wins 3-0 KO)

Wigsplit Vs Lizman

Rules are posted in this thread.
Topics are posted in this thread.

CHECK INS ARE DUE FRIDAY (07-15-11) AT 11:59PM PST. VERSES ARE DUE TUESDAY (07-19-11) AT 11:59PM. NO EXCEPTIONS.

Line Length: 20-30 lines.

EVERY participant must vote on at least two other battles in the league. If failed to do so, their current battle will result in a no show.

Voting Rubix
Rhyming Scheme/Flow
Vocabulary
Topic/Meaning
Storytelling/Progression
Emotion
Poetic Techniques
Ending

GOOD LUCK

Wigsplit Vs Lizman

Rules are posted in this thread.
Topics are posted in this thread.

CHECK INS ARE DUE FRIDAY (07-15-11) AT 11:59PM PST. VERSES ARE DUE TUESDAY (07-19-11) AT 11:59PM. NO EXCEPTIONS.

Line Length: 20-30 lines.

EVERY participant must vote on at least two other battles in the league. If failed to do so, their current battle will result in a no show.

Voting Rubix
Rhyming Scheme/Flow
Vocabulary
Topic/Meaning
Storytelling/Progression
Emotion
Poetic Techniques
Ending

GOOD LUCK

[Wigsplit]

THE KIDS SUFFER


I was partyin hard, when my eye caught this thick dark chick/
She was like Oh My God! Wanted to stick her with my thick chalk stick/
We got to talkin, she got to smilin, if only i had heard the siren/
My dick was thinkin for me, i jus wanted inside it, it's been decided/
To her home, I was invited, excited, she had a fat ol ass, n daddy liked it/
She said Oh Yeah! Daddy bite it, I boxed with her box, she screamed daddy! fight it!/
And I did, i beat that black pussy up like a racist white kid, talk bout some tight shit/
Fell in love quick, I was her light n she was my night bitch, i thought she was the right pick/
So we moved in together, i was love sick without her, she made me better/
and i swear to god, aint no pussy wetter, she the type to have ya spend all ya chedder/
eventually her middle grew, she said we was gonna have a little dude!/
i smiled from ear to ear, couldnt wait to see my boy grow from year to year/
and if any fags messed with him, i'd smear the queer, son, aint no one gonna pick on you/
if you fall ill pick you up, if ya feelin down, ill lift you up, dont worry bout shit, ill git the poo/
he kicked mommies tummy, as daddy acted like a dummy, but i meant what I said/
And i said what i meant, you cant take him from me, i'll take off ya head/
after a hard nine months, my lil boy was born, held him in my arms after i cut the cord/
from that moment on he was my world, i didnt know my world was soon to be torn/
me n my son, my son n me, i guess i stopped focusin on her as much/
cuz the bitch went nuts, nothin i did was right, i fuckin sucked/
then she eventually started tellin me, she had some other dude she sucked n fucked/
i was like what the fuck?!? you dumb ass slut, my child came out your fuckin cunt/
but she didnt give not one fuck, i felt like lettin the shotgun buck/
the tables turned, i was feelin down, saw my childs smile, n he brought me up/
needless to say, i aint with the whore no more, but my hearts still sore/
cuz im missin moments of my sons life, i cry every night, let the tears pour/
i miss singin to him, clingin to him, crawlin with him on the floor/
and when he has to go back to mommies, the way he cries, you'd think he missed me more/
all i got when he's gone is his pictures n his voice, all because i made the wrong choice/
the sound of him snoring, there is no other noise i'd rather enjoy/
im sorry your stuck between me and ya mom, i love you, i really have 3 kids, n i love all my boys/

[Wigsplit]

THE KIDS SUFFER


I was partyin hard, when my eye caught this thick dark chick/
She was like Oh My God! Wanted to stick her with my thick chalk stick/
We got to talkin, she got to smilin, if only i had heard the siren/
My dick was thinkin for me, i jus wanted inside it, it's been decided/
To her home, I was invited, excited, she had a fat ol ass, n daddy liked it/
She said Oh Yeah! Daddy bite it, I boxed with her box, she screamed daddy! fight it!/
And I did, i beat that black pussy up like a racist white kid, talk bout some tight shit/
Fell in love quick, I was her light n she was my night bitch, i thought she was the right pick/
So we moved in together, i was love sick without her, she made me better/
and i swear to god, aint no pussy wetter, she the type to have ya spend all ya chedder/
eventually her middle grew, she said we was gonna have a little dude!/
i smiled from ear to ear, couldnt wait to see my boy grow from year to year/
and if any fags messed with him, i'd smear the queer, son, aint no one gonna pick on you/
if you fall ill pick you up, if ya feelin down, ill lift you up, dont worry bout shit, ill git the poo/
he kicked mommies tummy, as daddy acted like a dummy, but i meant what I said/
And i said what i meant, you cant take him from me, i'll take off ya head/
after a hard nine months, my lil boy was born, held him in my arms after i cut the cord/
from that moment on he was my world, i didnt know my world was soon to be torn/
me n my son, my son n me, i guess i stopped focusin on her as much/
cuz the bitch went nuts, nothin i did was right, i fuckin sucked/
then she eventually started tellin me, she had some other dude she sucked n fucked/
i was like what the fuck?!? you dumb ass slut, my child came out your fuckin cunt/
but she didnt give not one fuck, i felt like lettin the shotgun buck/
the tables turned, i was feelin down, saw my childs smile, n he brought me up/
needless to say, i aint with the whore no more, but my hearts still sore/
cuz im missin moments of my sons life, i cry every night, let the tears pour/
i miss singin to him, clingin to him, crawlin with him on the floor/
and when he has to go back to mommies, the way he cries, you'd think he missed me more/
all i got when he's gone is his pictures n his voice, all because i made the wrong choice/
the sound of him snoring, there is no other noise i'd rather enjoy/
im sorry your stuck between me and ya mom, i love you, i really have 3 kids, n i love all my boys/

[Lizman]

Born In Embrace

[Presents:] Gift Wrapped, From Darkness Of Mishaps

[Presence:]
The Light Full Of Delightfullness, The Nest A Brief Moment Before Self Destruction
Succumb To Temptation, Failing To Discern Never Ending Tunnels Before Revelation
Contemplation, Optional Holes In The System That Uncarved Hands Mend In Meditation
Sedation, The Verity A Death Clawed Hammer In Exclamation
A Trophy, Our Accomplishment, Our Win, But High Standards Earned Are Not As Easy To Retain
The Refrain Of Our Muse, Seduce Acclaims To Our Abuse, Where Repentance Remains

[Present:]
The Foursome That Forced Some Coarse Worn To Back Their Way,
Passionate Clenches And Restrictive Encompassment, Now Forlorn And Gray
The Torn And Gaped, Long Sworn Encased Door Thats Placed, For A New Born Form From Today
Scorn That Fades Into Coring Days, Scoring Spores But Rather Chores Thats Sorting Their Place
Fought And Failed, To Resort To Former Plays, That Sort Wont Deport Until Forty Eight
The Head On Its Shoulder Handed To It, The Hands Of The Beholder Handled By It
The Feat Of The Follower Landing To Fit The Feet Of Its Rollover On Its Landing Strip
The Significance, The Strength, The Good Riddance In Length, The Ligaments Enhanced Signals That Tense
It All Depends, On The Filaments That Stand, Fulfilling Crossovers From A Woman To A Man
Hair To Hairy Heir Airing Rings, Hearing Palms To The Psalms Of The Lobe, Pair Of Wings
Dare Let The Dear Descent Barely Inched, Transfinite Nightmares Reprise, When Aired A Whinge
Digits Of The Paw Abortively Touching The Next, Yet The Stiffness From It All By An Abortion Defect,
Love Is In It All, But The Pauses Reflect That The Love Is A Dove Cautiously Departing The Nest
Nox Themed Dreams, Where It Is Howling In Frets, Tedious Periods Now Cracks In The Souring Thats Axed
Estranged Touches Now Common Digest, That The Bearers Of Good News Cannot Bore With Some Sex
Little Things, Pardon The Mess, Cause This Little Thing May Bring A Spring Foreign Of Past
Gift Wrapped From Darkness Of Mishaps, A Brief Moment, Born In Embrace That Lasts

[Lizman]

Born In Embrace

[Presents:] Gift Wrapped, From Darkness Of Mishaps

[Presence:]
The Light Full Of Delightfullness, The Nest A Brief Moment Before Self Destruction
Succumb To Temptation, Failing To Discern Never Ending Tunnels Before Revelation
Contemplation, Optional Holes In The System That Uncarved Hands Mend In Meditation
Sedation, The Verity A Death Clawed Hammer In Exclamation
A Trophy, Our Accomplishment, Our Win, But High Standards Earned Are Not As Easy To Retain
The Refrain Of Our Muse, Seduce Acclaims To Our Abuse, Where Repentance Remains

[Present:]
The Foursome That Forced Some Coarse Worn To Back Their Way,
Passionate Clenches And Restrictive Encompassment, Now Forlorn And Gray
The Torn And Gaped, Long Sworn Encased Door Thats Placed, For A New Born Form From Today
Scorn That Fades Into Coring Days, Scoring Spores But Rather Chores Thats Sorting Their Place
Fought And Failed, To Resort To Former Plays, That Sort Wont Deport Until Forty Eight
The Head On Its Shoulder Handed To It, The Hands Of The Beholder Handled By It
The Feat Of The Follower Landing To Fit The Feet Of Its Rollover On Its Landing Strip
The Significance, The Strength, The Good Riddance In Length, The Ligaments Enhanced Signals That Tense
It All Depends, On The Filaments That Stand, Fulfilling Crossovers From A Woman To A Man
Hair To Hairy Heir Airing Rings, Hearing Palms To The Psalms Of The Lobe, Pair Of Wings
Dare Let The Dear Descent Barely Inched, Transfinite Nightmares Reprise, When Aired A Whinge
Digits Of The Paw Abortively Touching The Next, Yet The Stiffness From It All By An Abortion Defect,
Love Is In It All, But The Pauses Reflect That The Love Is A Dove Cautiously Departing The Nest
Nox Themed Dreams, Where It Is Howling In Frets, Tedious Periods Now Cracks In The Souring Thats Axed
Estranged Touches Now Common Digest, That The Bearers Of Good News Cannot Bore With Some Sex
Little Things, Pardon The Mess, Cause This Little Thing May Bring A Spring Foreign Of Past
Gift Wrapped From Darkness Of Mishaps, A Brief Moment, Born In Embrace That Lasts

[Black Book]

Wig: Your story wasn't that original but the fact that it's real and the detail does add. It also fits the picture. So this was decent, not great.
Liz: Seriously, what the fuck? This made no sense. There was no storyline. I admit, your vocabulary is large, but it's sorta pointless. I honestly don't understand what you were trying to convey.
Vote: Wigsplit

[Black Book]

Wig: Your story wasn't that original but the fact that it's real and the detail does add. It also fits the picture. So this was decent, not great.
Liz: Seriously, what the fuck? This made no sense. There was no storyline. I admit, your vocabulary is large, but it's sorta pointless. I honestly don't understand what you were trying to convey.
Vote: Wigsplit

[Catharsis]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow: Liz
Vocabulary: Liz
Topic/Meaning: Wig
Storytelling/Progression: Wig
Emotion: Wig
Poetic Techniques: Liz
Ending: Wig

Victory Wig, ...I've been reading and writing poetry since I was little, Saul Williams is one of my favorites, so the abstract approach of Liz's drop wasn't lost on me, but with all it's flowery vocab it didn't have the emotional relevance of Wig's true story. Good drops from both tho.

[Catharsis]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow: Liz
Vocabulary: Liz
Topic/Meaning: Wig
Storytelling/Progression: Wig
Emotion: Wig
Poetic Techniques: Liz
Ending: Wig

Victory Wig, ...I've been reading and writing poetry since I was little, Saul Williams is one of my favorites, so the abstract approach of Liz's drop wasn't lost on me, but with all it's flowery vocab it didn't have the emotional relevance of Wig's true story. Good drops from both tho.

[exZACHly]

Enjoyed both reads...Felt One's Emotion & Story Telling outshined others Flow and Vocabulary in this one though...Vote: Wigsplit

[exZACHly]

Enjoyed both reads...Felt One's Emotion & Story Telling outshined others Flow and Vocabulary in this one though...Vote: Wigsplit

[Revan]

Winner via 3-0 KO: Wigsplit.

[Revan]

Winner via 3-0 KO: Wigsplit.