[NatsHubby]

AT's homies will watch THESE ROUNDS HURT THIS WHORE QUICK, it'll "Dawn 'on 'em after son goes down" and they'll BE OUT "EARLY, MOURNING!"

- The dawn/sun/mourning concept has been played. Other than that the wording in the punchline was nice, the setup had nothing to do with the punchline though, had a little sense of continuity but no conceptual connection to the punchline itself.


AfterThought? I hate this HOPELESS FAGGOT, he tryna get famous, become well-KNOWN IN MATCHES but "he's invisible, in the ring" & I don't mean FRODO BAGGINS!

- The whole "I hate this...known in matches" was filler as it packed no concept but it was just a sentence with multiple multi sets with no jabs or connection to the main punchline. Saying he's invisible in the rings doesn't actually pass off as a diss unless you mean he no shows a lot, then in makes sense. The concept was meh.


Who says Afterthought is ACTUALLY KNOWN?, HONESTLY, if you hear "A-T(ee) is extra-large"? that's FAT PEOPLE'S CLOTHES SHOPPING SPREES!

- The setup you talk about his popularity/him being known and in the punch you call him "extra large" (which again is not a diss, you don't actually call a person extra large and insult him, the wording is just awkward) which are two different ideas and not related to each other. And you don't actually say "clothes shopping sprees". The multi in itself sounds so forced grammatically and in terms of annunciation.

I HURT & MUG LAME NERDS, i'll prolly "bask in robbin" AT NO 31 FLAVORS! I'll shove a screwdriver into ya face, that's how I RIP FAKIN' Gs, to put it "past your eyes" like making MILK SAFE TO DRINK! (pasteurise)

- Take a minute, would you say "Hurt and mug lame nerds" in an actual conversation though? Thats simply filler because it doesn't pack any concept nor is it related to your punchline. The baskin robbin concept was executed poorly, what do you exactly mean by "AT NO 31 FLAVORS"? Because it makes no sense nor does it "Diss" your opponent. What exactly and how do you "RIP FAKING Gs"? The term itself is so filler and not needed and it seems as if you just added it there because it fit in with the multi scheme in the bar. The pasteurise wordplay is beyond played and dated to be honest..

Honestly this verse was a 5/10 in all honesty.

[NatsHubby]

AT's homies will watch THESE ROUNDS HURT THIS WHORE QUICK, it'll "Dawn 'on 'em after son goes down" and they'll BE OUT "EARLY, MOURNING!"

- The dawn/sun/mourning concept has been played. Other than that the wording in the punchline was nice, the setup had nothing to do with the punchline though, had a little sense of continuity but no conceptual connection to the punchline itself.


AfterThought? I hate this HOPELESS FAGGOT, he tryna get famous, become well-KNOWN IN MATCHES but "he's invisible, in the ring" & I don't mean FRODO BAGGINS!

- The whole "I hate this...known in matches" was filler as it packed no concept but it was just a sentence with multiple multi sets with no jabs or connection to the main punchline. Saying he's invisible in the rings doesn't actually pass off as a diss unless you mean he no shows a lot, then in makes sense. The concept was meh.


Who says Afterthought is ACTUALLY KNOWN?, HONESTLY, if you hear "A-T(ee) is extra-large"? that's FAT PEOPLE'S CLOTHES SHOPPING SPREES!

- The setup you talk about his popularity/him being known and in the punch you call him "extra large" (which again is not a diss, you don't actually call a person extra large and insult him, the wording is just awkward) which are two different ideas and not related to each other. And you don't actually say "clothes shopping sprees". The multi in itself sounds so forced grammatically and in terms of annunciation.

I HURT & MUG LAME NERDS, i'll prolly "bask in robbin" AT NO 31 FLAVORS! I'll shove a screwdriver into ya face, that's how I RIP FAKIN' Gs, to put it "past your eyes" like making MILK SAFE TO DRINK! (pasteurise)

- Take a minute, would you say "Hurt and mug lame nerds" in an actual conversation though? Thats simply filler because it doesn't pack any concept nor is it related to your punchline. The baskin robbin concept was executed poorly, what do you exactly mean by "AT NO 31 FLAVORS"? Because it makes no sense nor does it "Diss" your opponent. What exactly and how do you "RIP FAKING Gs"? The term itself is so filler and not needed and it seems as if you just added it there because it fit in with the multi scheme in the bar. The pasteurise wordplay is beyond played and dated to be honest..

Honestly this verse was a 5/10 in all honesty.