The Lost City
From my window’s vantage,
I looked down on the city Atlantis
as its concrete streets sunk swiftly and vanished
beneath the bleak seas. Whirling windy, it vanquished
the howls of this steel child left drifting, abandoned.
And I saw the city’s many penniless, gritty and famished;
standing stranded on rooftops of the flimsiest canvas.
The emptiest hands get ignored. … Poor city Atlantis;
men died, clenched in the grips of this withering mammoth.
Others floated on blind faith and miniscule promises,
wrapped in deflated inner tubes. The citadel’s hostages
lay trapped in liquid spools of a brutal fate’s embrace,
to waste away in bitter pools of human waste, they pray.
And I watched as Death leapt from the sea
a hungry thief,
plundering the crumbled streets in its drunken feast.
Liquid tentacles tickled piano notes; brushed the Keyes,
swallowing the audible garbles of a trumpet’s plea.
From my vantage…I watched their futile scuffles for air.
Atlantis became a vibrant canvas of water-colored despair.
The ash-black, pastel blue faces of the oxygen starved,
formed a macabre mosaic with every single carcass involved
in this masterpiece of atrophy; painted asphyxiation;
the ideographic images for pain’s heinous deviations.
I watched
as Death celebrates this abhorrent devastation
and horrid decimation. Rotting corpses elevating
over the somber sea, with determined dissent,
fled their graves for the ocean water’s Current events.
The dead danced in the streets and delight in the throngs
of zombie citizens, singing overzealous zydeco songs.
Long stretches of road, adorned with the poor and dejected,
mingled with the corpses the water’s force resurrected.
And we watch,
far and removed as the horrors ensue,
ignoring a truth that gallons of sea water couldn’t dilute.
It’s safe to voyage into voyeurism…It’s so easy to watch
when the needy are propped up on stages and seated in hot
spotlights. From our vantage, pain takes center stage. And
it’s easy to blame the victim, when it’s only entertainment.
We throw down any payment for the show and say it killed,
while they try to soak up ocean water with the paper bills.
But…
from my window’s vantage,
I can’t help but love the poor city Atlantis
as its concrete streets sink swiftly and vanish.
It’s poor denizens, looking up for a chance to be saved
While Death arises like flood waters
to dance on their graves…
A Chilling Tale
Written by Richard Corey
More losers to laugh at, wait, shit, one of these guys won.
Here are the names of the participants in the Final of the Anonymous Topical Tournament.
Writer 11 (1st) / Writer 3 (2nd) / Writer 3 (QF) / Writer 1 (SF) / Writer 2 (F) – Jam Jar (Previously defeated SideEight, Enfinite & InCizion)
Writer 31 (1st) / Writer 2 (2nd) / Writer 4 (QF) / Writer 2 (SF) / Writer 1 (F) – Dono (Defeated prospectJS, Row, The Law & Jam Jar)
prospectJS
Navigating Hell
I wake up this morning from a terrible night with four-missed-calls
as I return them back and hear a word from the phone,
I already sensed that there was more-shit-wrong
"homie guess what?! *sigh* tego got stabbed up yesturday.. the poor-kid's-gone"
damn..
the only thing that's rotating around my head is couldn't the killer solve it a different way?
or-fist-brawl?
this left me with no option but to blame his father's-absence
i say this because all tego did for a living was sell ganja-and-spliff..
just for some dollars-and-whips
plus he was repping a gang so the killer must of did this to honor-his-clique
as payback, since they lost one of their own in the past due to the same issue
but what can you do about it.. karma's-a-btch...
there was only one word to describe everyone's feelings for this slaughter.. shockness!
hoping tego would of got the chance to live farther-than-this
*shake's head* this defitnetly gon be hard-to-forget
i'm just lookin around, tryna find a jar-for-a-tip
as suddenly my heart-shred-to-bits
wow..
i just can't believe that both gang's massive-hating-dwelled
& aggravation-swelled
to the point, that all that matters to them is giving each other some tragic-facing-Ls
now unfortunately, the both caskets-raising-fell..
i still cant believe these two warriors last moment in this earth were savage, dangerous, well..
i guess what happens, happens and no one can change that spell
but sadly, they joined a gang for protection and a family
without realizing that it was just the first step for the road trip of navigating-hell!
Violent Scripture: A decent topical, but there were some flaws. I felt that the flow was very choppy in some places and it made the reading of it to be very awkward at times. I also felt that some of the rhyming was stretched and it almost turned into story telling instead of spoken word. My final issue was some of the vocabulary used, as some of the words attempted aren't even words and it really takes away from a rating. Overall a decent piece, but there are flaws that can definitely be corrected.
Punk: The story was good.. But the structure through me off everywhere.. With topicals, you have to make it so where the flow is easier to pick up instead of people having to re-read parts over and over.. The wording can use a lot of work. This is just some basic rhyming put together as a whole to sound great when it only sounds sorta good. Your punctuations were-not-needed-here also. You want the readers full attention by setting it up the right way, have an interesting story, & overall, a dope topical.
SHEEP LORD
End it Like This
Been through the beats, couldn’t pick my producers pre-mixed shit
Had to spit it acapella, then he told me I’ll mix it when you’re done/
Flipping through books reading like philosopher
From Greek metaphors to civil war treasure troves
Making my mind go thru the barrel rolls like we’re in a Tail’s spin/
Knowledge behaves the way you take it and spray
Had to kick rocks, and hit the strip to get with my crew
And score some chicks but bricks is what my click had in mind/
Speak to cats on the block, had to catch my second wind
Now they asking me to sin, sell something that’s supposed to help me win
Didn’t want to get caught them with bags on me and up the river sticks
Just for trying to make a few bucks, some cheddar and chips
Just to get a decent single just to be mixed not including a whip for the trip/
Peep months later debating bars speaking on topics alone in ciphers
Had me super hyper, single bout to drop then producer lost the mix
Kicking and screaming I’m pissed about to HULK SMASH!!! In this bitch/
Flip the lid the demo, got stuck on a bad hard drive
Luckly I had the emailed copy, smart cookie wasn’t born no emcee rookie/
Gets a call from my homie up the block asking if I still carrying that sword
I come out the box, and lock horns with sons trying to game my homes jawn/
Get off the bench minds are minced meat, these cats ask what’s your problem
I said get the fuck back, sword slash guns clash move fast
This ain’t no western, someone’s dying tonight…ARGHHHH!!!!/
Cut to black, walk off the set, role the credits
Watch out, see what comes next is the director’s cut … coming soon/
The sequels leave it those that want to end beautiful
This ain’t no flick for your wifey this is blood bath
End it like grapes of wrath; end it like blood on the dance floor
End like Frankenstein hype off of rhymes,
End it like Einstein drunk fucking sixteen bitches
Making sure there triplet pairs of dimes
Think he’s going to solve his equation by eating her equator out
Violent Scripture: A good piece, but has some flaws in terms of the poetic sense of it. Not really much rhyming, as it felt like it was a story being told instead of poetry. Just work on the poetic side of it and you will be fine.
Fidel Z: Well, His topical verse was okay, I don’t know if it’s just me but it barely rhymed and it was pretty basic, Also some of the things he said didn’t really make sense to me “ knowledge behaves the way you take it and spray” . Overall the thing that bothered me the most about his topical is that it didn’t rhyme at all, cuz that’s what attracts me to topicals, so in my opinion it’s an okay topical.
HariZon
Stereotypical
The same crowd that vouches for unjust kinds,
Fruit drum mimes that dance to the music in mind.
Telepathy, arguing with the conscience at hand,
Chloroform; soaking each ounce of will to withstand.
Mending the wounds treading atop the skin of his life,
Catastrophic but in light it only succumbs the message to fight.
Lessons contrite; bitin the tongue of lucifer holdings,
Monkey see, monkey do.. So have a seat for this scolding!!!
We tend to with hold and never let the best come forth,
Drain the pipe of rejection and rid acceptance of all sorts.
.
.
My mission is clear and cause I'm a certain race or kind,
Shouldn't wither the stride I'm givin' for changing the times.
Catalyst; with a reproach that tests the the mind,
Ravaging the most sacred temple that other pray to indict.
Just like you- so stop assuming my right and giving me shine,
Let me blend with the lines I scribble, print my name, date and sign!!!
Live free or die trying...
Punk: First off, a very solid piece.. One thing you need to work on is using schemes for your topicals. Here was just a different rhyme after another but it was still pretty cool. Not pulling anything from it. And a stronger vocabulary could help as well. Not just throwing down random words but it has to make sense and flow at the same time. Try reaching for much smoother openers as well. It's become sort of a issue with a few people but you'll get the hang of it by practicing.. Overall, i liked it man. Keep it up..
Fidel Z: In my opinion his topical verse was dope, I loved the rhyme scheme of it he was consistent throughout his whole verse by also having inner rhymes which made it flow even better, and I liked his use of vocab, and sophisticated wording and how he went into detail describing his topic, overall I didn’t really see anything wrong with his topical pretty solid.