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  #4  
Unread 08-28-2013, 04:37 PM
Dono
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 1,740
Mentioned: 782 Post(s)
Tagged: 61 Thread(s)
Estimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 stars
Ranked Audio Record
11 Won / 8 Lost
Exclusive Audio Record
1 Won / 0 Lost

Estimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.6/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.6/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.6/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
35 Won / 37 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
1 Won / 1 Lost
Default

As a topical writer, my main draw is the story. I feel like Dirty work had a better overall story here, though I saw the twist coming a decent way before the actual reveal and the details could be flushed out a little better. Diss, I felt your flow and multi structure was a bit better but the story didn't have enough emotional pull to make up for the rather straightforward storyline.

Both should look into polishing their wording. Some of the phrases sound weird and some of them are obviously just there to rhyme. Keep on keepin on.

Vote to Dirty Work.
__________________
Make music? Post it on my Internet Radio website! http://noteis.us
Unread 08-28-2013, 04:37 PM   #4
 
Dono
Estimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.91/10 stars
Ranked Audio Record
11 Won / 8 Lost
Exclusive Audio Record
1 Won / 0 Lost

Estimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.91/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.6/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.6/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.6/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
35 Won / 37 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
1 Won / 1 Lost
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Voted: 24 audio / 306 text
Posts: 1,740
Mentioned: 782 Post(s)
Tagged: 61 Thread(s)


Default

As a topical writer, my main draw is the story. I feel like Dirty work had a better overall story here, though I saw the twist coming a decent way before the actual reveal and the details could be flushed out a little better. Diss, I felt your flow and multi structure was a bit better but the story didn't have enough emotional pull to make up for the rather straightforward storyline.

Both should look into polishing their wording. Some of the phrases sound weird and some of them are obviously just there to rhyme. Keep on keepin on.

Vote to Dirty Work.
__________________
Make music? Post it on my Internet Radio website! http://noteis.us
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