One's topical was fairly good in being able to build on the story while making sure that it rhymed. The poetic aspects were also very good and articulated quite well, especially considering the topic itself is very "rigid" because the idea of active duty is not a free-flowing concept to go through, so very well done on that. Other's topical I felt was very good as well in terms of the rhyming portion, but it was hard for me personally to keep up with the story because of the separations between the plot. Also some of the writing I felt was straying a little off topic because it seemed as if he was trying to go in between two main ideas at one time. I have my winner.
W: XplicitKontent
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