Quote:
Originally Posted by A-thom
here's a verse if ya wanna critique
would ya mind droppin an expo on this verse? any critism greatly appreciated. thank you 
ya can't rap! it aint a "mystery" why ya don't know how to "DOO IT"!/"country" boy was"suprised as a "ghost" when he saw my 8! said "BOO SHIT!"(bull shit)/ this "cat" couldn't "fix his bars" event though he's a "TOOL KIT"!/ calm down! think he "geeked" wished he was a "COOL KID"/ this aint a battlefield more of a "CATTLE FIELD" so "MOO(move) IT"/ bout to "make some burgers". ill "have ya dinner"! i do some CRUEL SHIT!/ ya couldn't "L" "A" if ya lived there! ima bout CLIP YA(clippers)/ this package of "mars bars" is here! "lines outta this world lame" and its time to SHIP YA!./ why are you freakin out? i didn't TRIP YA(tripping)/ or maybe ya "buggin out" cause of the 8 i SENT YA/ "BENT THE moth" with the "swat" cause this AINT FLY/ even though this own the computer you readin your lines like watching PAINT DRY! |
This verse gave me a concussion.
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Yes Yes Ya'll, an it don't stop....
Seems like me an' you bout had enough,
Cause man, it's tough to keep the fam in touch,
And to add it up, this rappin stuff got me flippin out like a blackjack bust
Don't give a fuck if you sound like Master P, Mobb Deep or Remy Martin,
Cuz even if the next to try us is the best of rhymers?
Still get bodied on plates like Jeffery Dahmer
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