Thread: LB Voting
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  #30  
Unread 01-05-2020, 10:09 PM
IIAM
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 688
Mentioned: 92 Post(s)
Tagged: 1 Thread(s)
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 5.67/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 5.67/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 5.67/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 5.67/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 5.67/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
5 Won / 3 Lost
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 2FUEL View Post
The wording you chose was poor and makes the read awkward. The irony of asking whom has the proper grammar when yours (here) is atrocious. “That GEEKER PROPPER GRAMMAR”... these come across as rhyming/force rhyming for the sake of it. “Your box is filled w/ lies you MEAGER PAUPER SHAMMER”..? Seriously, man... that’s horrid.

Advice: focus on your punchline and write backwards from it, don’t force multis just for the sake of having them rhyme. You want your bars to flow, be coherent and sound natural.
That’s his name Proper Grammar.

Who’s got the WEAKER AWFUL BANTER,
That GEEKER PROPPER GRAMMAR ,
Or Croz’s BLEAKER GROVELED STAMMER?
Your box is filled with lies you MEAGER PAUPER SHAMMER.

that line alone shits on his entire verse.

ii know it’s hard for you to say cause your accent is atrocious,
But it isn’t forced at all, plus ii don’t expect you to ever side with me on anything.
I could say 2Few used to be a MOD and you’ll try to prove me wrong.
Plus that drop was enough to 100%-0 that kid.

---------- Post added at 09:09 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:05 PM ----------

It’s like ii’m saying
Who’s more of a faggot?
Guts or 2Few?

Proper Grammar is one person,
Croz is another.
__________________
I am the Ray of light which appears at your door and goes where it wishes.
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Unread 01-05-2020, 10:09 PM   #30
 
IIAM
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 5.67/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 5.67/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 5.67/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 5.67/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 5.67/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
5 Won / 3 Lost
 
Join Date: Oct 2019
Voted: 16 audio / 41 text
Posts: 688
Mentioned: 92 Post(s)
Tagged: 1 Thread(s)
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by 2FUEL View Post
The wording you chose was poor and makes the read awkward. The irony of asking whom has the proper grammar when yours (here) is atrocious. “That GEEKER PROPPER GRAMMAR”... these come across as rhyming/force rhyming for the sake of it. “Your box is filled w/ lies you MEAGER PAUPER SHAMMER”..? Seriously, man... that’s horrid.

Advice: focus on your punchline and write backwards from it, don’t force multis just for the sake of having them rhyme. You want your bars to flow, be coherent and sound natural.
That’s his name Proper Grammar.

Who’s got the WEAKER AWFUL BANTER,
That GEEKER PROPPER GRAMMAR ,
Or Croz’s BLEAKER GROVELED STAMMER?
Your box is filled with lies you MEAGER PAUPER SHAMMER.

that line alone shits on his entire verse.

ii know it’s hard for you to say cause your accent is atrocious,
But it isn’t forced at all, plus ii don’t expect you to ever side with me on anything.
I could say 2Few used to be a MOD and you’ll try to prove me wrong.
Plus that drop was enough to 100%-0 that kid.

---------- Post added at 09:09 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:05 PM ----------

It’s like ii’m saying
Who’s more of a faggot?
Guts or 2Few?

Proper Grammar is one person,
Croz is another.
__________________
I am the Ray of light which appears at your door and goes where it wishes.
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