The almost formulaic rhyme scheme was an interesting touch. The structure reminded me of something I might read in a literature class. It might be a bit too stifling in terms of readability for some people, but I thought you carried it well. I could bitch about the relatively low syllable count and the one multi I thought was awkward ("alpha to sigma"... is there some reference there that I'm missing?) but that would be disingenuous considering how readable this verse was.
As for how you incorporated the topic itself, I thought it was excellent. I can understand the idea of someone being born into a bad group like the KKK, and only after they're well into adulthood and have already done more than a few dirty deeds understand the evils of said group. The last line actually elicited an emotional reaction from me, which topicals rarely do.
I'd give this verse as a whole 8.5/10.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Row
I got the feel that the piece was in the perspective of someone in a group who do bad things
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I got the feel that you don't know what organization is generally associated with the garb on display in the topic image.