Interesting . . One was story telling and the other was speaking symbolically.. the latter being the more obvious approach imo.
Writer 2 tried to take a creative approach which I can respect, but it wasn't all that coherent; I fail to see the connection between the three paragraphs.. especially the first one.. who is "he"? I assume it's the villain but if the blade isn't piercing her, how is it piercing "him" before he even entered the room? And just the phrase "the blade' s attack " sounded awkward. The whole piece had grammar issues which promoted to the coherence of the piece.
Other had my interest from the start until the second half a couple of lines were pegged with words I had to Google, but also, the train of thought derailed for me.
One piece just had less questions to ask, coupled with better rhyming and grammar.
Writer 11
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