Writer 10 - A fairly risky but interesting decision here. You did take an original approach on the picture which was very good. I didn't specifically think that the story really went anywhere though. One thing I think would have been CRAZY dope for this, was if you wrote 14 lines in the style you did, with Lil Wayne bragging and shit, then another 14 lines in intelligent language, with Wayne being disgusted at how he's leading people along. It was an okay drop in the end. I didn't think you really added the rhyming to back up it's style, but then again Wayne wouldn't have the rhyming anyways haha.
Writer 3 - The main downside is that your protagonist got killed at the end. I'm never a big fan of this ending to drops. Ranks only slightly higher than "and then I woke up". Also, how was the protagonist narrating the story? From beyond the grave? Another slight thing would be going into the fact that his entire family were military before. Perhaps thinking "Did my family go along with this? Did they do it themselves?". The lyricism was great throughout. Flowed really solidly. You had some great wording in there too, specifically "a mosaic of body parts" was a powerful image.
Overall, I find one took a safer route and executed their topical a lot better.
GMV - Wirter 3
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Writer 3 Wins 5-1
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