PDA

View Full Version : Opinoins Please


masterc
06-21-2014, 10:44 PM
Posted on another site against someone with the user name Jay. wanted to see what everyone thinks.

I'm hittin this "Jay" like Jordan when he fades back/
Leave him blue like the bird wit the way that I slay tracks//
You need lay back listen to Em, Pac, and Dre tracks/
Cuz tryin to beat me's like runnin in circles bitch, race tracks//
You're a mid level rapper just like ya name alphabetically see/
Ya just the Jay that makes everyone want to get some Z's/
Learn what meta's for please, Cuz I spit sick shit like crazy/
You words played G, and ya punches like glass joe's dont even phase me//
I land mine in multis, so sit back and Watch Man like ya names McNulty/
Not understanding me fully, this elementary shit, so ya ass get bullied//
No deceipt ya flow is weak and ya know that ya beat/
You see me I rock Jay's like the shoes on my feet//
Work ya vocab son, get a dictionary/
Cuz I could out rap you while just playin pictionary//
Last name start wit a K? Cuz ya kidding me right/
You KO'd like Jay Bell in a McClellan fight//

Expos - Some are obvious but will put em anyway 3rd bar - reference to him comparing himself to Jay Z in another battle, and letter J in the middle of the alphabet.4th bar - Metas for = metaphor used the different categories battle raps based on in my lines, metas, multis, punches, flow, vocab.4th bar - Glass Joe is the first and weakest fighter on Mike Tysons Punchout5th bar - Kevin McNulty was in the movie Watchman8th bar - Jay Bell is pro boxer got KO'd in twenty seconds by McClellan

stricc
06-21-2014, 10:56 PM
i thought it was below average or just barely average to be honest...not hatin but most if not all of your punches are simple and constructed horribly,hit some vets up if you really wanna get better

ILLoKWENT
06-22-2014, 11:06 PM
Some of that ish needs no expo.. ur shortbar technique is fairly decent..just your concept game is still rudimentary

ET the Refugee
06-24-2014, 01:02 AM
you could really omit half of that if you set up your punches better and the punches you dont omit will hit much harder...... not bad overall though..... mid to low