2013 GC: RD1 - Obey Vs Tha Dog Vs Manhattan (No Showed) - (Tha Dog Wins 3-0)

[Hubert Cumberdale]

Obey Vs Tha Dog Vs Manhattan

This topical is part of the 2013 Topical Grand Championship

Rules
Verses are due Friday, November 8th.
Verses are to be posted in THIS thread.
There are NO EXTENSIONS.
Verses must be 20-30 lines long.
Vote deductions will happen for people going over.
Voting is best out of 5.

Topic
Green with Envy

[Hubert Cumberdale]

Tha Dog's Verse

Envy a form hate Green reveals true motives of homies consider great,
Plant Land Mines in Real Estate, Blowing Up what's your's ...
Broke bread with niggas like My Policy Open Doors, but Envy's perverse - wealthy niggas hating when a has'been copped the galore...
Sin of greed plagues the rich or poor, no exempts pray to Yehweh He takes this tempt...
On the Road Of Riches haters wanna Repo Success, Steal Your Time walking with A Rollesk...
Praying for my downfall rejoice for my last breath - feeling stress gettin' cloudy with friends...
So I wait in the Blue Sky Catching The Wind, my annual resolution Envy End - if not let them burn in their sin...
I grin at revenge - you spit Crack this Cocaine Binge, cowards!! Gimmie Open Heart Surgery don't mustard Half The Heart...
Viral Infection Without Contraceptive, what I spit - I give blessings while Spirit of Cain's got y'all stressing...
Take a lesson envious niggas never last long, the new don my reign lives on - fond of everybody getting shine...
While they hating on mine, cowards no spine envy my grind - die slow snort a line...
Thought we can coincide, but envy breed lies - Dying With Yo Open Eyes you were wasting time...

[Obey]

Green with Envy

I was mugged heading home by a poor-man, ready to take life for-ten; he was holding his glock,
"Is this what you want, my cash w/ your gun? Look at the way you’re molding this block.."

"We got kids with a life ahead, how’re you going to tell you wife your dead?" He stayed sound,
I lowered my sleeve to his throat, surrounded around this moat, in his flesh was the blade found..

I was ready to show these people, money is the root to evil, I’m ready to end this place,
I won’t go down as a hero, ready to put this city’s population to a zero; a man ready to fend his race.

I thought of a way to assemble, ways to get in their mental, get them all in one spot,
I'll spread the word of some free cash, stock up on some cheap gas, smiled and reassured myself, ''some plot..''

I stocked up on the anthrax, loaded all that I can pack, removed my whole life saving,
I told the people "free money at ten, it’ll fall from the sky" that’s when, it’ll drive cravings..

Hired a trusty pilot, I told’em he must be quiet.. on the run-way I covered that face,
Threw him to the floor then, proved how easy it was to lore him, "money got you here" as he smothered, sat laced..

In the bag was about ten gees, I was just about ready to mend peace, flew over the spot,
Dumped the cash from the plane, watched it splash over the lanes, they didn’t think this new odor would drop..

They cheered picking the cash, smoking their cigarettes, flicking the ash; Beginning to feel weak,
Over-looking the streets, internally cooking these weaks, I put them in for a real treat..

The money rubbed their flesh, they adored it till none were left, the city was quiet,
They all suffered for paper, gave their lives for manual labor, how could these bills cause riot?

Finally I touched down, heard someone moaning a rough sound, "On society you're just a cheap stain,"
Holding my gas mask, I threw a match in the vast cash, ''You all finally got to meet Bane..''

http://images6.alphacoders.com/332/thumbbig-332887.jpg

[Hubert Cumberdale]

Manhattan has No Showed. Tha Dog Vs Obey is OPEN FOR VOTES.

[Joe MuGGz]

Dog: I personally feel like your verse was all over the place.. BUT thats not always a bad thing. When I say "All over the place" I mean you gave us some dif flavors.. first it was touching the street side.. then you took em to church.. then you applied it to you.. Nice lyrical content at times.. nice solid verse.

Obey: I see you took the story route.. which is cool.. It was an extreme story to say the least. lol.. Correct me if Im wrong,... So you was getting mugged, and then you killed the guy. That obviously wasnt enough cus you then wanted to kill the entire city.. and leave the population 0.. Stole a plane, and threw gas soaked money on the city.. then set fire to it? Ok.. So where does the topic come in at again? I know the robber was poor.. and yes he couldve been green with envy, but you didnt express that.. the people picking up the cash was greedy maybe.. opportunist even.. but not envious.

MVGT Dog

[Sean Cron]

Tha dog: you did good with staying on topic. I feel like the first half of your verse was the best. a lot of subtle comparisons and feelings related to envy. I feel the end could have been stronger, and there wash't one continual narrative. It did stay on the topic of envy well though. some good rhymes and flow here

Obey: I really appreciated how this verse was put together. all of the paragraphs were about the same same size wise and conceptually. and the narrative was pretty dope. I took it as 1. guy gets robbed, 2. he plans to give everyone money, 3. he throws money from rooftop or plane, 4. he caught the money on fire. so as i understand it, it's kinda like don't be greedy, everyones greedy, we could teach them a lesson by catching the money on fire. which is a decent concept. I felt like the ending could have been a little bit more of a twist or there could have been a few lines to really tie the greed to envy. it was a little more apparent in the start and I understand the connection.

Overall: pretty close to me, I wanted to give it to obey at first, but after a few reads, tha dog was a bit more on point here, no h8.

MVGT: Tha Dog

[Hubert Cumberdale]

The Dog Wins 3-0

[RULE]

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tbm