TOPICAL TOURNAMENT RD 2: Dosage (winner) vs Xander (loser) 3-0KO

[Ill Phenom]

TOPICAL TOURNAMENT 2011 ROUND 2

Dosage (http://www.letsbeef.com/forums/member.php?u=90164) Vs Xander (http://www.letsbeef.com/forums/member.php?u=883177)

House Rules Apply. Any questions, contact me.

CHECK INS ARE DUE WEDNESDAY (09-28-11) AT 11:59PM EST. VERSES ARE DUE SATURDAY (10-01-11) AT 11:59PM. EST. NO EXCEPTIONS.

Line Length: 20-40 lines.

http://bsimple.com/Inspiration.JPG

Voting Rubix
Rhyming Scheme/Flow
Vocabulary
Topic/Meaning
Storytelling/Progression
Emotion
Imagery
Poetic Techniques
Ending

GOOD LUCK

[Xander]

...checkkk

[BFNE CEO™]

this should be good!!!!

[John Dos]

Checkin in...

Picture's dope as fuck btw...

[Xander]

..Awoke in a land of Death & Dismissal, dead fighters lye here, Restin like Crystals..
But this aint the streets, I got no Breath of a Pistol..
So I gotta escape, so quick you would Guess Rape, I turned to run...
I see a man with an Two Swords and a Chest Plate I duck under his first swing..
Runnin' as Fast As Possible, he stopped like a bird with a Hurt Wing but the Facts Are Marginal..
I hear music I make it my Duty to Follow, it sounded like home, Boozing with Nachos...
I slow down start to Walk Closer, my clothes now torn like I am Not sober..
A Two hour trip with my Body Aching, it feels like it had very Shoddy Making...
So I sit down, Promptly Waiting, my body feels better like Godly Aging
As I get nearer I can see Two People..they looked lifeless, like a New Evil..
Gassed themselves up so much it's like they Spew Diesel...
The first in a Black Robe; Conducting the Song, the women in white mad, cuz she's Instructing it Wrong..
She's like a Struggling Mom, doing everything she can and still Juggling On..
The Black Robe gets angry, and goes to Drown her in Ocean other one just holdin' Back her Emotions..
^^^ This is proof society sucks, my Tracks just a Portion, before you judge us..we just trynna make Cash n' the Fortune
Innocent males, Slaughtered the system is Officially Staled, Altered.
Just Inches from Fail, Onward, but, they always made a big deal of Bustin' the Ridaz..
When the CIA was Fundin' Al Qaida..so when the cops, as Blunted as Snipas..
Are tyin' ta kill Hundreds of Fightas, the Son of a Liar, just Summed up the Writers..
But that's how soceity is, Fucked like some Minors

[John Dos]

http://bsimple.com/Inspiration.JPG

A sudden crash awakens me from of a twisted lucid dream
The sound grasps the thread of sanity and rips it through the seam
I hold my ears in terror, I can't bare to listen to the scream
I feel my body start to move, yet feel paralyzed inside
I walk into the darkness, see pale skin and a pair of eyes, they're wide
Staring deep into the depths of my soul, it speaks..."follow me"
"I have someone with me that I think you'll want to see"
Again I feel my body move, and I still feel stiff inside
I have no control over myself, or the thoughts within my mind
Pictures flash at rapid speed, but I can't seem to finish a thought
It's like sippin a shot of GHB, all memory? LOST
I see an old man, rocking in a chair by himself
A book full of photgraphs behind him appear on a shelf
A woman and a man, holding hands and embracing
Suddenly thoughts rush in my head, and I plan on escaping
"You're mine now, you'll do as I say"
I shout "I'm not just some fool to be played"
"Oh, but you are...and you're looking at that same fool on this day"
Suddenly the man stands up from sitting still
I feel a rush and inner chill, a sudden sense of thrill
He walks in my direction and looks into my eyes
and says "you've lost it all because you couldn't lose your pride"
Suddenly I'm flying over an ocean, thoughts flowing through my head
"Everytime my presence was shown to you, you've fled"...
"She controls you now, it's you're fault for resisting my pleas"
"You're selfishness caused you to be sick and diseased"
"So now you'll roam the earth with her, watching all the happy people"
"And remember every day...giving could have released you."

[John Dos]

let's get some votes in ppl. we didnt post these for nothing.

[Xander]

Bummmmpppping

[Wigsplit]

Voting Rubix
Rhyming Scheme/Flow- Dos, i felt he flowed it real good, Xander did well in this too
Vocabulary-tie, nothin major
Topic/Meaning- Ima go with Dos on this one, his made more sense to me, whereas xanders was kinda confusing imo
Storytelling/Progression-Dos, once again, Xanders kinda seemed rushed into different subjects, he had some good imagery tho, Dos's went along a lot smoother imo
Emotion-Dosage, he kept you there with him as he went through all this, and that helped him out with this cat
Imagery-Tie, both had good imagery imo, I could visualize the stuff they was speakin on
Poetic Techniques-Tie, both was good here
Ending-Dosage, I liked how he rapped his shit up, it was a tight battle from both tho

MVGT-Dosage, his verse was easier to follow along to, and it did pretty well with stickin to the topic, I liked his concept, Xander, good shit tho, not takin anything away from you, I was jus feelin Dos more in this particular battle

[ozark]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow- tie, both had pretty smooth flow here
Vocabulary- ill go with Dosage here, although xander did not lack either, i believe dosage used a bit more.
Topic/Meaning- tie- i liked both takes on the picture
Storytelling/Progression- dosage had more of a story line to his....
Emotion- tie- both had good emotion here
Imagery- dosage again, he gave better detail
Poetic Techniques-tie, both had good concepts here....
Ending-dosage- xander kinda left me with questions.

mvgt DOSAGE, although it was a close battle imo....good reads from both, i enjoyed yalls takes on this pic

[Ill Phenom]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow - Dos - Slighty. I felt his flowed all the way through with no flaws in the flow.
Vocabulary - Tie - Neither really outshined the other in this cat
Topic/Meaning - Dos - Another close one here, I felt that dos was more consistant with his topic relating towards the picture, where as, xander, went off with the other thing in certain parts.
Storytelling/Progression - Dos - Dosage storyline progressed from beginning to end, felt xander hopped around a bit and didn't have a real start or closing finish.
Emotion - Dos - Slighty though. Felt his emotion shined a bit more from his consistancy to stay on the topic
Imagery - Xander - Barely. Liked some of the details he used to describe the things going on.
Poetic Techniques - Tie - Like the flow cat, neither really outshined the other by too much
Ending - Dos - He put a real close to the end, and you knew his verse was over.

Dos GMV

[Hubert Cumberdale]

Bump for formatting.

[RULE]

added

tbm