PDA

View Full Version : Round 1: Beyond Lunatic Vs God G Kool (God G Kool Wins 5-2)


UnEtHıCaL
09-14-2011, 01:52 PM
Beyond Lunatic (http://www.letsbeef.com/forums/member.php?u=864602) Vs God G Kool (http://www.letsbeef.com/forums/member.php?u=867395)
Letsbeef Topical Tournament 2011 Round 1

House Rules Apply. Any questions, contact me.

CHECK INS ARE DUE FRIDAY (09-16-11) AT 11:59PM PST. VERSES ARE DUE WEDNESDAY (09-21-11) AT 11:59PM. NO EXCEPTIONS.
(Note: Deadlines are 1 week due to Sandman's tournament round. Other rounds will be shorter)

Line Length: 20-40 lines.

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cY2u8GXdyc8/TeWPSkgJ5vI/AAAAAAAADOg/XR8RmCPGyQw/s1600/RainbowBridge.jpg

Voting Rubix
Rhyming Scheme/Flow
Vocabulary
Topic/Meaning
Storytelling/Progression
Emotion
Imagery
Poetic Techniques
Ending

GOOD LUCK

Eye G
09-18-2011, 05:19 AM
bump this.....Up

Beyond Lunatic
09-20-2011, 09:50 PM
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cY2u8GXdyc8/TeWPSkgJ5vI/AAAAAAAADOg/XR8RmCPGyQw/s1600/RainbowBridge.jpg

''Colors Of Hope To Heaven Bridge''

As A Human,You Left Me Lonely & Reclusive In This Earth/Then
As A Creature,My Analysis Identified Animal's Words Through Heart/
I Philosophize To Illustrate Prefect Virtuous Fiction To Heaven/
Where Me And My Pet-Friend;Gratify The Moment 247;No 9/11/
It Aint Hood;It's All Good;Bush Approach Obama To Forgive Laden/
This Is What I Dream;More Materialize Less Abstract/
Love Is Felt Rather Than Deep-Thinkin' And Attract/
Im Stompin Feet Of Yeti But My Egotistical Wont Be Killin' Insects/
My Best-Homie Was My Dog;I Was Bitchless for Chillin' Impress/
Without A Surname;He Goes By The Name Of ''Blood''/
We Were Close-To-End Like Haemoglobin & Vein On Drugs/
Friendship Is Perceived By Inner Sense;Dedicates An Eternal Consciousness/
Jay-Z Phrase We ''Young Forever'' But ''99 Problems'' Of Death Took My Acquaintance/
My Dawg Aparted Away Before Joy Of Adolescents/
''Blood'' Is Gone So How Can This Boy Be Convalescent/
He Was A Real Dog To Life;Aint No Bitch/
Impeccable Soul Migrated Him To Rainbow Bridge/So
Still He Is Delighted Now;Even Smile On Tears/
He Was My Domestic Now Im Wild N' Rare/
I Missed The Word Spoke Through Language Of Heart/
I Wish I Be There With You;God,Please Reincarnate My Birth/
Dragin Our Past;We'll Be Livin To Heave-&-Play Together/
Reminiscencin Those Days In The Street-All-Day Together/
Past Is Hopeless;I Cant Bring It Back;I Just Remember That/
Future Is Faith So I Desire To Cross That Rainbow Bridge Together Fast/

Beyond Lunatic
09-20-2011, 09:51 PM
there you go..g'luck!!

Eye G
09-21-2011, 05:48 AM
...::Freedom to live::.....


all my feelings and emotions are flowing in a creek,
structural demise, but my soul is going thru new crib,
i feel so good that theirs no agony and pain in ma life,
now ma views and desires won't end in a vain, coz i see light,
that illuminates the path that i was willing to walk,
all those wounds caused by old memories are filling w/a chalk,
i never expected my life to be colorful like rainbow
this beauty hits ma psyche and hormones inside ma vein flow,
the sky is shining w/the groups of stars,
now i don't have to work hard w/ soldiers troops on wars,
theres only one best path to follow,
walking along new friends thru the bridge chasing apollo,
now i see the peace and beautiful life outta earth,
for a second when i reminisce the past, i feel like why i took the birth,
now i please to the god, not to make me lil wayne i need no rebirth,
coz living on that planet theres no extention of lives it never worth,
theires no lives for we animals, coz we are governed by humane,
we are the victims of the society they blew our brain...
i'm buzy at the work so i couldnot drop hard,
but don't worry i'll illuminate this picture on next bar...

Beyond Lunatic
09-21-2011, 11:19 PM
Bumpin!!!!!!!!!!

IV
09-22-2011, 05:11 AM
Rhyming Scheme/Flow--- parts of lunatics flowed really nice, but Kool was more consistent- kool
Vocabulary- lunatic, very complex, nice
Topic/Meaning- Lunatic, liked the dead dog route, sad though..
Storytelling/Progression- lunatic had a clearer storyline
Emotion- both very emotional, but lunatic
Imagery- lunatic
Poetic Techniques- lunatic showed it wasn't all about a perfect rhyme structure
Ending- Kool your ending was funny, could tell it wasn't your best and you wanted to drop. Lunatic i liked your ending

Overall- Lunatic i think your verse was emotional, different, and articulate. Although it didn't flow or rhyme perfectly it still had a good impact with a clear story line. Kool your verse was emotional and rhymed well, flowed nicely, not much of a story line/progression and think you could have done better.

Vote- Beyond Lunatic

ozark
09-22-2011, 05:23 AM
Rhyming Scheme/Flow- imma go with G on this, his flowed a lil better imo
Vocabulary- beyond got this cata, though g had nice usage also
Topic/Meaning- i liked g's direction a bit more, but luna had a great read also
Storytelling/Progression- both had nice reads imo so tie
Emotion- luna had more emotion imo- but g didnt lack much
Imagery- luna- painted a better picture imo
Poetict Techniques- im caught on this one, both good imo
Ending- i liked gs ending more tbh- great from both though- keep it up- gl to both

Mvgt GGK

Luke Eamiah
09-22-2011, 05:38 AM
rhyme scheme and flow- G was flowing a little more clearly imo
Vocab- Beyond was real deep with the vocab. Gotta go with him.
Topic- I liked G's idea more BUT he didn't really illustrate it. Giving it to Beyond
Emotion- I thought G was almost like a cypher the last bit. so i have to give the heartfelt emotion to beyond
storytelling- I have to give this to beyond since G was a little over the place.
Imagery- as to having the picture painted in my head, beyond tried to be to complex so the picture wasn't real visible. going with G on this one.
Poetic technique- this is where Beyond excelled imo
Ending- was loving G till the ending bar.... like he just used a filler. Giving it to beyond

Overall- Great battle. First topical ever so you guys are going to help me alot getting into it myself. Both used skill and thought to try to formulate a hard hitting, emotional verse. Although it was close, I think one edged a bit more due to a few things.

vote- Beyond lunatic

Eye G
09-22-2011, 05:54 AM
was going to give a deep thought but was at work .....so couldn't do so.././///thanks newayz appreciate it,.....as i told .....i'm buzy at the work so i couldnot drop hard,
but don't worry i'll illuminate this picture on next bar..........i'll picture out next 16/32lines on the same thing but not for battle....

UnEtHıCaL
09-22-2011, 06:08 AM
2-1..........

Wigsplit
09-22-2011, 06:41 AM
Voting Rubix
Rhyming Scheme/Flow- GGK flowed better imo
Vocabulary- Beyond
Topic/Meaning- GGK, I followed his easier, Beyond was a lil difficult to follow
Storytelling/Progression- Beyond told a better story, but GGK made more sense, tie
Emotion- I was feelin more from GGK
Imagery- Beyond
Poetic Techniques- Beyond, but GGk did alrite too
Ending- I was feelin GGK's more

Overall Vote- GGK, I just could follow along with it better, both was tight tho, jus keep at it

BFNE CEO™
09-23-2011, 02:19 AM
Rhyming Scheme/Flow gotta go wit G on this...luna had a few lines that didnt rhyme to me...even tho G had a line or 2 that didnt rhyme also
Vocabulary gotta go wit luna on this...tho G had some nice vocab
Topic/Meaning tie on this...both were on some pretty deep heaven stuff
Storytelling/Progression tie on this one too...bith didnt progress as much as they just told there thoughts on the topic...i liked both
Emotion tie both were pretty emotionall on the same level
Imagery gotta go wit G on this one his picture was painted a lil more clear...i will give luna some props tho for his complexity just a lil too much complexity and not enough vividness
Poetic Techniques tie both were on the same level imo.....
Ending gotta go wit G on the ending it looked to me that luna was just goin thru the motions at the end and didnt really give his drop that much meaning imo

my vote goes too G.....both were good at the same time as not being all that deep. i was kinda bored with both by the end but it was an ok read at the same time from both........

G'LUCK to you both

IAmFlow
09-23-2011, 11:39 AM
Rhyming Scheme/Flow - GGK - His was short and sweet. BL had some lines that didn't rhyme and some of his wording took off the flow a bit.
Vocabulary - BL - He obviously took this cat reading the verses.
Topic/Meaning - GGK - GGK had more of a verse were you can follow it from start to finish (for the most part) as in some of BL's concepts were changing up as he wrote, and because of the wording the meaning wasn't as clear as it should have been.
Storytelling/Progression - Tie - Have to agree with what wiggy said on this one. Beyond had this cat but the way he worded a lot of his lines put it all over the place. Many of them weren't even grammatically correct, these verses should be read like your reading a fluent grammatically correct sentence and/or poetic style.
Emotion - GGK - He just expressed it a bit better.
Imagery - GGK - Neither was great. But I felt as an imagery wise towards the picture that he got this cat. A lot of his verse was describing what was in the picture.
Poetic Techniques - BL - This was a pretty close cat. Neither one of you really shined in this aspect. Although BL had the rough patches through his verse, he took the more similie, metaphoric, connective verse.
Ending - Tie - TBH Both endings were pretty iffy. No one really put it to a complete end with the reader knowing it was the end.

GGK GMV.

Dizz Da Dogg
09-23-2011, 01:43 PM
Rhyming Scheme/Flow - Kool
Vocabulary - Lunatic
Topic/Meaning - Kool
Storytelling/Progression - Lunatic
Emotion - Lunatic
Imagery - Lunatic
Poetic Techniques - Kool
Ending - Kool

Judging by my cats its a tie. But there's only one winner. So overall the one i felt more was Kools.

Hubert Cumberdale
07-31-2013, 08:35 PM
Bump for formatting.

RULE
01-04-2020, 06:47 PM
added

tbm