Round 1: STRANGE 1 Vs Catharsis (STRANGE1 Wins Via 3-0 KO)

[UnEtHıCaL]

STRANGE 1 (http://www.letsbeef.com/forums/member.php?u=868137) Vs Catharsis (http://www.letsbeef.com/forums/member.php?u=859952)
Letsbeef Topical Tournament 2011 Round 1

House Rules Apply. Any questions, contact me.

CHECK INS ARE DUE FRIDAY (09-16-11) AT 11:59PM PST. VERSES ARE DUE WEDNESDAY (09-21-11) AT 11:59PM. NO EXCEPTIONS.
(Note: Deadlines are 1 week due to Sandman's tournament round. Other rounds will be shorter)

Line Length: 20-40 lines.

http://inversekarma.in/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/Nostalgia.jpg

Voting Rubix
Rhyming Scheme/Flow
Vocabulary
Topic/Meaning
Storytelling/Progression
Emotion
Imagery
Poetic Techniques
Ending

GOOD LUCK

[BFNE CEO™]

Checkin in!!!!!!

[BFNE CEO™]

http://inversekarma.in/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/Nostalgia.jpg


guess i will drop first!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





damn it im gonna be late again for another day of school and education
i had to be on time to day had to find a way not to be late to show mom my determination
i went four blocks north and then 6 blocks west cant be late so my direction i stress
school is three miles away so i gotta do my best i gotta get there and get there with quickness
fuck... i gotta rush... why did i miss the bus??? and now i only got an hour to get there
seen the RR xing signs tracks crossing lines and remembered mom and dad told me to beware
a steady pace to maintain but i didnt here a thang , matter of fact i never did come to think of it
stupid, dangerous, insane...how??? if theres no train... so i didnt believe it
so i climbed through the trees fell and scraped my knees damn it i just got these
shot up like a rocket dusted off my pockets a slice in my pants i tried to stop it... the bleeds
if thats the worse i ever get then i shall count myself lucky and blessed
that will probablly be the closest i will ever get to death
almost there with tine to spare and just a mile left
i will show mom i will go on and be the best....then i suck in my breath
so a short cut i had found first to class i was bound...but
when it came it was loud and i knew that sound...fuck
i started running fast im outta breath and its gaining faster
why i didnt just let it pass hop to the right or left was a thought i had after
i was to scared to think to scared to blink to scared to know what to do
all the days i or it never came this way but to day that whistle blew
trip, stumble, fall, slip, tumble awe... shit i cant move
some how my jeans got snagged on the track along with my shoe
should of just stayed goin the way i was heading or i should of just gone back
who new a short cut ment a life cut short... who knew i was going down the wrong track

[Catharsis]

Fuck...hope it's not too late to check in. Shit's been nuttier than squirrel turds this month.

[Mind Fuck]

Fuck...hope it's not too late to check in. Shit's been nuttier than squirrel turds this month.

Deadline to post verses is less than 12 hours

:eek:

HURRY cath!

[Catharsis]

http://inversekarma.in/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/Nostalgia.jpg



I stumble down this track, back to the past, face to the future.
I bleed these cold steel lines and your help's just a waste of a suture.
Fluid pouring out my veins at the pace of a moocher, I've borrowed time now I chase the wind.
Vowing that every step I've taken... I will never take again.
See I could fake a grin.... but that's the me I've left behind.
We've lost ourselves on this path to nowhere, now there's nothing left to find.
Yes we're blind, Yes we're stupid...no we don't know what's in store.
So I'm still moving with no purpose, asking what you're rushing for.
Sometimes life's a fucking whore, other times she's got the brain.
This life is known to be a trip... I say fuck it ...hop the train.
Me? I'm still walking ... unsure of where the junction is.
Unsure of what my reason for even getting up to function is.
2 short steps from punching kids... but that would be regressing.
Not the way of moving on to which I've been proffessing.
It's a basic term that we hate to learn... we call it ''progressing.''
I say my burden is a blessing, a counterweight for a life... teetering off the rails.
I'm screwed...I built a structure and somehow I just forgot the nails.
So it just drops and fails, yet such is life...
and such is this the way I choose.
Built by slavery, maintained by greed, indeed a kin to the way I move.
Today I cruise............ one step then the next.
Forsaking all that came before... and fuck who it affects.
This track connects us like the beat, can't you feel the pain drumming?
I smell change in the air, and thats good...
... but I think I also hear a train coming.

[UnEtHıCaL]

Wtf at Cath dropping so quick lol. HOW can people no show if he can do that? lmao. I'll get at this later on but respect on that C.

[UnEtHıCaL]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow - Catharsis. Cath was alright, but he mainly got it because Strange stretched his lines a little. Shorten them up and it will flow off much cleaner and get to the point quicker.
Vocabulary - Catharsis. Small level above.
Topic/Meaning - STRANGE1. Generic, so was Cath's. I enjoyed Strange's more and the ending really brought the story together.
Storytelling/Progression - STRANGE1. Cath dwelled way too much. There was some unclear moments in STRANGE'S but he kept on topic quite well to take the cat.
Emotion - Cath. Easily.
Imagery - STRANGE1. There was no real images in Cath's and the simple story gace a good image to STRANGE's. I keep picturing Stand By Me lmao.
Poetic Techniques - Cath. A couple metaphors really took this one with ease.
Ending - STRANGE1. I liked how Strange too a with no originality depth and forced it to have both. The "short cuts/cut short" wording was good. Cath's was way too generic and the train coming was obviously a metaphor which was too vague to follow 100%.

GMV// STRANGE1. Tie on the cats, and Cath probably edged the cats on how much he won some, but the cats Strange took hold more weight to me. I liked his story and the ending almost single handedly won it. I think Cath rushed his and was a little too unoriginal using vague emotional moments to dictate a verse. Good contest guys.

[IAmFlow]

Going to class. I will edit this with my vote after.

[Eye G]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow - Rhyming wize Catharis was smooth and steady to follow....Strange : Rhymes weren't that alluring ....

Vocabulary - Both were on same level...

Storytelling/Progression - Strange had more elaborated one...

Topic/Meaning - Strange got this one ..it doesn't mean that u'r bad ..

Storytelling/Progression - Strange got this one...

Emotion - Catharis....got it...

Imagery - both were on kinda same level...

Poetic Techniques - Couple lines were good from catharis

Ending : Strange had good ending ...

Vote : Goes for whom ? both were on kinda same level so both of ya got it ... \\^// ...its tuff but vote goes to strange...

Good looks

[Ill Phenom]

Was going to vote. But it's IV sooooo...

[UnEtHıCaL]

Crew votes are allowed.

[Capitalist]

Rhyming Scheme/Flow: Catharis I felt was more on point here with his flow.
Vocabulary: Catharis, made it seem more of an educated written.
Topic/Meaning: Strange1 imo put more into his topic.
Storytelling/Progression: Strange1.. Felt he took this category.
Emotion: Catharis: Pretty self explanitory.
Imagery: Strange1.. very creative.
Poetic Techniques: Catharis imo took this category easily.
Ending: Strange1.. Felt it a bit more..

My vote: Strange1

[Catharsis]

Yeah...I typed this up in like 10 mins lol. I'd rather rush than no show.

[UnEtHıCaL]

^And it's appreciated.

[Hubert Cumberdale]

Bump for formatting.

[RULE]

added

tbm