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LetsBeef Discord Battle League presents: CORONATION Listen on SoundCloud

Text Cypher
Length: 32 Lines each

"Letter To My Moms"

B U R D E N
Tha B L A C K - S H E E P

B U R D E N

I was coolin in cribs while you were slavin them hours,
..was droolin on bibs & you never caved in or coward.
When in need of ah lift, you gave them with power..
ah seed to ah kid, no kid now but I'm makin this tower!
Tryna make mother proud, cause she slowed up her act
& dealt with other crowds to put clothes on my back.
I love her now as much as I did in tha past,
from rougher ground to livin in laughs. 
So, for every moment ya spent in ya zone for ya cents,
I'll give back wit ah big pad.. make it ya home with no rent!
That's tha least I could do, cause..
Through all tha pain & tha hurt, you barely complained 'bout ya work..
everyday was tha same, you'd slave for tha first. 
To pay bills for our place, & place meals on our plate..
so before I let you down I'll put my skills on ah page.  
Get ah deal, hit tha stage.. better my wrongs as ah kid
& mom I know you're as strong as it gets but still I'm amazed.
Cause see, there ain't ah person alive I look at tha same.
You were first in my sight, gave me looks & ah name. 
There were times I'd be hurtin at night.. uncertain, in fright
but you'd b workin tha fight that never worsened, it died. 
I mean, you gave me advice before I needed your thoughts..
now I know it plays in tha role of leading your spot.
So believe it or not, you taught right from wrongs
& how to exceed to tha top.. though tha flight is long
I'll succeed & won't stop until I'm weak & I drop.
These are things that I say, so it's ah fact that ukno.
So, I hope that you've heard.. & get that I owe you tha earth.
I know it's not much, but I wrote you some words to show you your worth.

Letter To My Moms. 
Leave REAL feedback & any advice you have that'd help better this piece.

Rate this Cypher

Cypher started: December 25^th 2014 at 12:54

Staff Comments

Óðinn
<THE GOAT>

Nice ish, fam. Agree w/ Lock on this too.
Rated: 10

Posted on: 2014-12-29 11:31:32

Member Comments

RipThaRappa <~1ChAmP~>	always been a big fan of real shit, easy Dimez, should be recorded with the right type of beat. keep grindin fam Rated: 10 Posted on: 2014-12-25 16:34:32
ChainsNThangs <~Ambidextrous Assassin Agency~>	I felt Like I was REading Some Def Jam Poetry... I can feel the admiration for ones mother through you writing...Merry christmas and do what sounds right to you man! Gj.. Rated: 8 Posted on: 2014-12-25 23:12:09
Official_C2 <_Lyrical_Gods_>	I loved the consistency and the rhyme schemes and the overall emotion of the verse. I noticed some wordplay that was clever, I like that. I advise you use more multis as that's what seems to impress people these days it'll also improve your flow if you plan on actually recording this, but other than that it was dope. good job man. Rated: 8 Posted on: 2014-12-26 00:17:03
Subreal <THE BAT GOD>	It read nicely and u could tell u were writing some true shit in ur thoughts, stuff like this doesn't need to be crazy complex and lyrically heavy, so u did it well. Good shit Rated: 10 Posted on: 2014-12-27 14:48:35
Quincy® <D ▼ P E .>	dimed ez... feel like me and my mums haha.. shit i feel you bro.. mad deep brodie.. keep it pushing.. ~100~ Rated: 10 Posted on: 2014-12-29 11:28:36
Bnas <Multiville Horror>	Damn man this shit was nice, very dope concepts dude, I hope you showed ya mama it Rated: 10 Posted on: 2014-12-31 12:56:31
S O U L R I T E	Yea I agree with Lockhart. This wasn't about multies or structure or anything like that chief. Some pieces of art can't be critiqued. This is definitely one of them. My only knock is that I would have liked to hear what it sounded like if it were on Audio. Very touching bro. No lie. Rated: 9 Posted on: 2015-01-02 13:58:14
SAND	Everyone agreeing with Lock... nigga i cried!! This shit related to me in so many different ways it'd be hard to explain. Growing up, my mom worked 3 jobs, I had to raise myself & my brother since she was never really around. But she always got us what we needed, put us through school and all that. So I feel this, homie. Dope shit. Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-02 22:52:18
Joe MuGGz <Murda Muzik>	Yo this gets dimes... Salute! Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-04 11:28:06
Paroemiographer <Archives>	It's good to show appreciation every once in a while. Especially when it's deserved, and for most people, it's our guardians who deserve it most. This flowed smooth and was an entertaining read. No doubt. Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-05 18:32:02
Insuppressible <Letsbeef Pricks>	Anything to do w/ members of the family is always a great cypher. In this case it was flawless. Awesome shit Verbs. Flow was great and message was something I think most of us can relate to. Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-05 18:55:07
Akaap <The Last Don>	Honestly you can't put anything but a dime piece up for this, I love the emotion put into the script a very good drop and you didn't have to sacrifice flow or anything on this piece it's almost perfect in all categories I'm very impressed...good drop my brotha Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-05 19:10:34
Cujo Caine	awesome cypher good job Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-05 19:54:53
King of Reach	Man this was awesome! Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-05 23:04:22
COL3 <reapers domain>	Alright brother So it did feel like this was more of poetry then a song , now if that's what you were going for then man this is really inspiring and amazing However some simple fixes could keep peoples attention such as : I was coolin in cribs while you were slavin them hours, ..was droolin on bibs & you never caved in or coward. When in need of ah lift, you always sold inspiration ah seed to ah kid, but mom I'm growing into greatness similies and metaphors as well as switching up the rhyme scheme here and there but man this is super heart felt and I really enjoyed reading it man ! keep going and record this bro Rated: 7 Posted on: 2015-01-05 23:06:26
Dirty Work <Turnbull AC's>	hell, this is nice fam. not much to critique here, ima dime it. it's always nice to see someone writing shit with substance and not just !!!BARZ!!! lolz. I guess you spelled "cowered' wrong that's all I wanna gripe about lol Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-06 00:33:47
Infinite Dialect <Profesionally Orchestrated Tactics>	Honest feed no hate.. Simple rhyme scheme utilized in empowering way, Heart felt, clear concise expression of concepts with concistancy. well done! always room to elevate. Rated: 8 Posted on: 2015-01-06 14:09:17
Shodan <The Fire Nation>	Fam, this was some of the best shit I seen in a minute. I'm not gonna mouth off about any of the lyrical construction of the piece, cause it just didn't matter here. This was emotional, sincere, and absolutely excellent. I'm diming this with no regret at all. Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-08 19:36:48
Dope Slang	Emotion in this is real.. Bruh I've always had a soft spot for my momma so I'm feeling this 100.. Miss that lady everyday.. In PACs words.. "ain't a woman alive that could take my mommas place".. salute g Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-09 16:38:29
Student	You've definitely got the feeling down and I'm not knocking it as a poetry piece, strictly from a rhyming place I felt like it could've been better but as far as emotion goes you nailed this out of the park. Always nice to see real issues being given attention. 100. Rated: 9 Posted on: 2015-01-14 18:00:49
The Ghost of Freak	Good heartfelt work. Really not a lot to say that is negative. For the sake of giving some feedback, my only criticism is possibly adding words here and there for syllable count (ex. adding those before "clothes on my back" creates internal rhyme and tightens up flow as far as syllable count). Dime EZ. Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-14 18:08:48
Flakko Brim	dime definately. Shit had meaning to it. i never had a moms and my dad barely there but i still feel this. good shit and keep it up. Rated: 10 Posted on: 2015-01-15 00:47:45
Pugz	Real shit from the heart.. dimed Posted on: 2015-01-29 06:08:24
Skizzo	This was cool bro, on a topical side it was deep, even though you had a very generic approach to the topic. I can tell this meant a lot to you though and you hit it where home was to you, so that was refreshing to read. I haven't read anything else from you so I can't say this was one of the doper pieces but I can say that this was dope and I could appreciate it from the angle you hit it from. Great verse pimp. Posted on: 2015-01-30 23:55:06
Skizzo	I tried to give you a rate of 9...and it kept saying "Improbable rating found - did you try messing with the code? Moderators alerted." Posted on: 2015-01-30 23:55:40
ILLoKWENT <G.O.A.T.>	feeling this drop, very heartfelt tone.. structure flowed decently.. multis were on point, doesnt need to be overly complex... good ish.. Posted on: 2015-02-02 15:26:42
ILLoKWENT <G.O.A.T.>	dunno why it wont let me rate it... but nice drop in deed Posted on: 2015-02-02 15:27:15
Jhulie	Fucking epic, man. I love real rap, the shit that tells a story and really matters. Good job! Posted on: 2015-02-04 08:00:19