last line edit "just ta watch as* his cortez Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-05-23 16:57:32

I accept :) Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-05-23 19:01:45

Some of these bars sound familiar! Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-05-23 19:25:41

*typo...switchin CHANNELS TO NEW SCENES.....keystle too Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-05-23 20:17:51

Button you smashing jumper from Allen is forced aswell Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-05-23 20:32:28

wat U n FROM.. thats not forced dum ass. forced is wen u set lines up to go wit multies.. that does not rhyme well nor connects with the punch...it flows right u ol Picky Grandma fuck outa here..send beef Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-05-23 20:39:44

Constuction with plastic is 6 syllables Busting the mac 10 is 5 syllables so u have broken multis aswell BITCH Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-05-23 20:47:39

lol..aight i see your very Meticulous.. fuck syllable u letsbeef geek this is not a syllable battle..get it togetha n send beef Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-05-23 21:30:57

no hate Voted: RELTIH / Consistent`
Posted on: 2013-05-23 23:34:23

Ight going in .... Scalpel .... Forceps .... RELTIH .... Bar1 .... Multies are on flow is cool but the context is abit hmmm da fuck gay uncles aids huddles the ICU I SEE YOU is ight but i don't see the correlation to a aids huddle ???? Isnt ICU a medical acronym for Intensive care unit??? 5/10 ... Bar2 ... EIGHTS MUZZLE , GREAT SLUMBER, RAPES COMIN, YOUR STOMACH, ATE SOMETHING multies are forced as they don't rhyme in terms of the punch in this bar there wasnt really one its a bit weak 5/10 ... Bar3 ... ok the cells ticked wordplay works nice but the multies to build up again where off the last words KIDS, HEADS, TICKS dont rhyme but punch was good 6/10 ... Bar4 ... Finished this bar with a SLEEPER MOVE how's that a punch the CHEEBACHEW was more of a punch felt like filler in ya verse 5/10 ... Bar5 ... Prolly ya best bar of ya verse good wordplay multies where still kinda off the pumping lead on um the last bit lead on um dont rhyme with ya ending of ya next multies 6/10 for the punch tho ... Consistent .... Bar1 .... Hmm opener i dont like cats who feed of verses shows lack of creativity short opener no real punch 4/10 ... Bar2 ... Like the construction with plastic punch was nice multies in between where 5 sylabel and the start one was 6 so was the end one watch that 6/10 ... Bar3 ... Ok what's with the 7 sylabel multies thrown in the middle of this ??? Surgent workin him back with ??? The punch was ight aid off kinda forced tho for me ... 5/10 .... Bar4 ... Lol at the zantastic and the nerds who aint dancing beating to the punch liked that starting then went off on some flow multies but nothing punching shoulda re-worded the bar and ended it with the nerds beating you to the punch 6/10 .... Bar5 .... Ok you used rel/rail now you trying to use rel/reel silly move there fam 4/10 .... Bar6 .... The closer nothing hard hitting here to close with .... 5/10... .......... "TOP TIPS" ........ Both yall need to look at ya multies and count the sylabels Hella forced multies from both .... Y'all both tried wordplays one more successful than the other .... Also think about using metaphors more you both have good concepts just not executing them well enough FV .:X:. Voted: RELTIH / Consistent`
Posted on: 2013-05-24 12:38:05

well he changed his name but uprising use to be ZANTASTIC FOR those confused Comment Only
Posted on: 2013-05-24 20:09:40

Ok this was quite an interesting battle because u had pretty much the same strengths and weaknesses. Rslith started off with some multis that, although simple, were on point. Once u get more confident u can up the vocab and complexity. Saying that, the opener itself wasnt really hitting and the content was a bit awkward, that whole gay uncle shit was wierd. U then tried to carry that scheme into ur next bar which made u force shit to work... But it didnt. U were touchin on some decent concepts but i think they needed a bit more time spent on them to bring them out more. After that ur multis were all over the place and u had some wording issues. Try readin ur verses out aloud n if it dont sound right to u then it probably isnt. There were attempts at wordplay and even tho they didnt always work i would encourage u to keep trying. Overall punch strength was mediocre. I would say that u need to focus on one line at a time, check the multis are on point, check the punch is strong and actually makes sense, dont move on until everything is hitting. Voted: RELTIH / Consistent`
Posted on: 2013-05-26 14:53:23

Consistent, u had the same issue with multis not matching and not scheming right. Ur opener was bad, u tried the flip and it didnt really work particularly with the failed wordplay. If ur gonna flip, which i dont recommend, atleast come with something hard. Ur multi count was off for id say 70% of the verse, it affects the readability so u need to keep an eye on that. U actually had a section in the middle of ur verse where the multis were nice but it was all filler, it didnt really lead on to anythin, but here u deomstrated that u can hold a scheme well and if ur whole verse was tight like that with a solid punch at the end then u could do some damage. Ur vocab is better than ur oppenent but the actual content is about the same. Its a tight battle and i can see reasons to give both the w. both need to keep an eye on the multi count and focus more on punches rather than keepin schemes goin longer than needed. Im leaning this way slightly because this guy i felt was a bit cleaner and conceptually was better. Id like to see u both take the advice given and go a round two Voted: RELTIH / Consistent`
Posted on: 2013-05-26 15:02:28

Decent spar here. Shit load of stuff to work on though no lie. Rel- You started off relatively decent but going on you had so many stretched rhymes and forced wordplay. Rhyming is a bit more lenient when it comes to stretching but there are certain things that ou can't do with wordplay. If you want me to do a full breakdown then pm me and ill gladly do it but for now just know that your main weakness was really stretched wordplay and rhyming. Your attempt at creative concepts is notable but still needs work. Con- What's funny is that you pointed out his stretched and forced rhyming and then succeded in doin the same thing. You had practically the same problems. What separated the winner from the loser was although the winner seemed to have more of an abundance of mistakes and stretches it was because he attempted more conceptual punches which I think definitely pulls the win in his direction. Keep trying and elevating. For further tips and expos pm Me. Generous rates for a 16 Voted: RELTIH / Consistent`
Posted on: 2013-05-26 21:03:30