NO HATE. Voted: BayAreaGAS / MisterMushroom
Posted on: 2012-06-20 23:05:26

FULL BREAKDOWN.. BAYAREAGAS : Your structure was off a bit.. I'm not gonna do a full breakdown but I'll do a quick one... Bay throughout your whole verse you lacked strong punches, set-ups and you concepts weren't to good either... Your multies need to be at least 4-6 syllables long not 1... Also work on complexity, the better the creativity and wording then the better the verse... MISTERMUSHROOM : Your wordplay wasn't good and also your multies need to be more advance, just like i told BAY, they need to be 4-6 syllables at least... And also your concepts, set-ups and execution was not strong at all.. The lack of complexity kept your verse from being stronger also and structure your shit differently.. Now I'll give both verses another read then drop a fair... Neither seemed to be strong in any aspect so i went with the more comical one... Both need to step there game up... Voted: BayAreaGAS / MisterMushroom
Posted on: 2012-06-21 04:22:37

It's been bugging me, GAS you do know the difference between France and England, right? Because it really doesn't seem like you do... Comment Only
Posted on: 2012-06-21 05:27:34

Bay: you got mmany broken multies tbh and no real punches just some dissies...Mister: you got no punches neither and you need to do add multis and tbh I don't even know what your verse meant...Both need to elevate..Keep practicing and you both will be good soon.Fair vote is in. Voted: BayAreaGAS / MisterMushroom
Posted on: 2012-06-21 08:57:03

ok bayarea, first off, if your cappin multis, stop right now, and work on how to construct actual multis, lets look at your first bar, if i can call it that, MISTER BRIT, and LINES THAT I SPIT, dont even match up, 3 syllables to 4 first of all, secondly, when handling multis, you need to match word rymes the way you would spit it... so mister brit would match wit killer kids, or filler ish... and this goes on thruout your verse, as far as disses, very little creativity metaphorically, pretty basic disses, imo....you need to focus on basic similes for starters, and incorporate it as a diss... then go from there... mistermu shroom'... same deal with you, cappin random words aint helpin your verse out especially here in lb, what i did like from you tho was you actually managed to throw in rudimentary similes in ex...im a crocodile... etc..and a wordplay.. pour tea,party... which in the context you wrote it made no sense as far as a diss... with that winner for me, came wit a bit more complexity and slightly stronger disses... fairs in... Voted: BayAreaGAS / MisterMushroom
Posted on: 2012-06-22 05:01:40

fv no h8 gb... but one barley pulled it off any problems send bars... Voted: BayAreaGAS / MisterMushroom
Posted on: 2012-06-23 00:46:15

NICE BATTLE Voted: BayAreaGAS / MisterMushroom
Posted on: 2012-06-23 12:13:00